Is It Better To Be Direct Or Indirect With Women? Ultimate Guide

Here’s a question I get very often: Is it better to be direct or indirect when seducing women?

The answer, quite obviously, is — it depends on the situation and on who you are!

As with anything in the real world, it’s not all black and white. There’s no best choice that’ll work in all situations. And the real answer is much more nuanced than “Be direct!” or “Be indirect!” when flirting with girls and trying to seduce someone.

That’s because whether you should be going in directly or indirectly depends on a lot of different things: It depends on your approach, on who you are as a person, your mindsets, attitude, whether the girl likes you at least somewhat, and on the circumstances of the situation itself.

So, to help you get the right answer so you can use the best approach at the right moment, I’m going to describe both direct and indirect ways of approaching seduction. I’ll show you advantages and disadvantages to both and explain when and why you should use each of them, for best results. As well as give you plenty of examples.

So let’s start off with being direct with women when trying to pick them up.

Most Men Are Afraid Of Being Direct With Women

Fact is, most guys are TERRIFIED of being direct with women.

I wrote an article about how to get any girl you want, which you really need to read. Once you click the link, go to the 3.6 section on the table of contents and you’ll get to “Bonus Quality – Being Unapologetic About Your Sexuality!“

You must read it if you’re afraid of “revealing” to women that you want to have sex with them.

Thing is, you, like the majority of men, probably don’t believe you can be honest and upfront with women about your sexual intentions. You probably think that if you walk up to a girl and express your sexual intent, she’ll get mad, start shouting at you, reject you in a very humiliating way, and so on and so forth.

Don’t worry, there’s nothing wrong with you because most men believe this. Even though this belief is false and is entirely based on fearmongering and not the real world.

Some guys even believe that if you say something crazy like that to the women, she’ll start calling the police or try to get some bystander to help her beat you up, etc.

But this couldn’t be further from the truth.

I’ve been very direct with hundreds of women when I was experimenting new things while learning how to approach girls. And the worst thing that’s ever happened to me was a rejection.

And as we all know, rejection isn’t even bad for you. It saves you time, helps you learn, and reassess yourself and your approach. So if you really want to be successful with women, you need to beat your approach anxiety and learn that rejection is not bad for you.

The probability of women going apeshit and calling the police and getting people to beat you up for showing your sexual intent is pretty much zero. So you need to stop imagining catastrophic scenarios and actually get into the real world and approach women and talk to them.

Don’t underestimate women

One more thing: Do you really think women don’t know what you’re really after when you hit on them?

Women aren’t stupid and they’re much better at figuring out what’s really going on than men are. At least attractive women with experience.

So if you’re walking on the street and see a hot girl and you run up to her – she already knows what you want!

She knows you find her attractive. She knows you want to have sex with her. And she knows that you’re going to try to talk to her to get her into bed with you.

And what’s wrong with that? ABSOLUTELY NOTHING.

Being unapologetic about your sexuality is being able to understand that we’re all human – and that we all have sexual urges.

Women know you have a penis and that you want to stick it into their vaginas. It’s not some big secret!

How do you expect women to want you sexually if you’re afraid of women knowing that you want them sexually???

So every single time you’re afraid of your sexuality when you’re around women you find attractive and want to have sex with – you are being your own worst enemy. You’re literally doing everything to turn them off of you. Because they’ll see that your entire behavior is incongruent and deceitful.

So here’s the core mindset when being direct with girls: “Why yes, I do want to fuck your brains out, and no there’s nothing wrong with that. In fact, you should probably take my intentions as a compliment.”

You don’t say this, of course. You BELIEVE THIS deep down inside. And believing this at the core will automatically change all of your sub-conscious communication for the better.

Now let’s talk about how to be direct with women.

Being Direct or Indirect With Girls Depends On How Quickly You Can Spark Attraction

First of all, both strategies of being direct or indirect with girls work just fine. It’s just that they both have their advantages and disadvantages.

The key is to know which approach you should use when and where, depending on the situation you’re in. Because the direct approach will be superior in certain situations with women where the indirect one will fail, and vice versa.

That said, some men will be much more congruent with being direct with women than some other men. While other guys will be very congruent with being indirect when trying to seduce girls.

That’s because different people have different styles of seduction, different personalities, and ways of communication with the opposite sex.

You don’t have to be “alpha” or “macho” when being direct with women. And being indirect doesn’t mean you’re a timid, meek and weak pussy. It’s all about using common sense and the best strategy for your specific situation.

When should you be Direct with girls?

You should be direct with girls when there’s already existing attraction towards you.

For example, if you’re a very masculine, tall and handsome guy and women feel attraction towards you as soon as they see you. Then the direct approach will work great for you.

Basically, if you’re great at making first impressions and sparking attraction right away, then being direct will often be an optimal choice for you.

That’s because being direct is a great way to cash in on the attraction that’s already there.

If you have existing attraction, being direct will put the ball in the girl’s court and give her an opportunity to act out on her attraction towards you. Which means being direct with women is an excellent way to speed things up from a simple interaction to getting laid.

However, there’s one small issue with being direct — IT DOES NOT CREATE ATTRACTION ON ITS OWN (unless you have game).

This means if you approach a random girl on the street and she’s indifferent towards you – the direct approach will usually NOT WORK.

That said, if you approach a random girl on the street and spend a bit of time chatting with her, having fun, flirting with her, teasing her, challenging her, joking around, and having a good time. And then you start noticing that she’s becoming attracted to you because of how the interaction is going. Then you can start being direct with her and it will often work really well.

As you can see, it often pays to be direct when the girl already likes you. Because it will speed things up significantly, especially if you know how to escalate sexually and physically.

But if you start being direct with women who don’t already like you – you’ll fail most of the time.

Warning – don’t be direct with women if they don’t like you

Just to drive this point home as much as possible – DO NOT BE DIRECT WITH WOMEN WHO DON’T LIKE YOU.

You see plenty of guys doing this mistake. Especially in places where they frequent often like school, work, university, sports, etc.

They see a guy go up to a girl and tell her she’s fine as hell and he’d like to go somewhere private and get with her. The girl blushes, perks up, hugs the guy and off they go to hook up.

Then the guy who sees this thinks he can do the exact same thing and walks up to a girl he fancies and starts being very direct with her in a sexual way. But the girl freaks out, calls him a creep and a pervert and makes a humiliating scene.

After this happens, the guy feels like a total loser. He slinks away in shame, starts thinking there’s something wrong with him and that he’s too ugly for women to like him. Making the stupidest conclusions possible that completely wreck his self-esteem and confidence.

In reality, that’s not the reason why he fails and it’s not why girls don’t like him.

What this guy fails to realize is that the guy he’s seen approaching the girl and being direct with her only succeeded BECAUSE THE GIRL ALREADY LIKED THE GUY A LOT AND ACTUALLY WANTED TO HAVE SEX WITH HIM.

If the second guy went up to a girl who’s already very much into him, he would also succeed by being direct with her most of the time. Because she already wants to sleep with him or is at least entertaining the thought. And all she needs to go through with it is the final little push of being direct about it. That’s the magic sauce.

What does it mean to be direct with a woman?

Now I’ll tell you exactly how to be direct with a girl when you see she already likes you.

Being direct is not about walking up to women and saying “You’re hot as fuck! I want to fuck you!” Even though that can work for very advanced guys.

Doing so just shows you’re crass, clueless and vulgar. And women will think you’re a repulsive creep.

That said, the reality of being direct with women is something CLOSE to the above, but not quite.

You see, women don’t want men to think they’re sluts, easy, cock-hungry, and so on. Because slut-shaming is sadly still a very real and prevalent thing in our society. So even though women LOVE and WANT sex and many are very promiscuous, they’ll only reveal this to very few men. Men who are SEX-WORTHY and know how to arouse women.

That’s why you have to be a little bit more suave about being direct. By not using crass and vulgar language and instead alluding to sex and multiple orgasms together.

So where do we start?

The best way to be direct with girls is to stop lying to them about what you really want. To stop lying about your intentions.

And what’s the biggest lie most men don’t have the courage to reveal to women? It’s talking to women like having sex with them is the last thing on our mind.

Guys go up to women to try and pick them up and start talking about where they’re from, what they do, about work, studying, and even about the FUCKING WEATHER. Even though they DON’T CARE about these things.

This only makes the conversation boring as fuck and completely incongruent with what you’re actually want to talk about. And women don’t like men who do this.

How to be direct with a girl the right way

Let’s be honest here – when you see a hot girl that you find very attractive and and you talk to her about the weather – you’re being completely disingenuous and deceitful.

You see a hot girl and you want to hook up with her. But you walk up to her and TALK ABOUT ALL THESE THINGS YOU DON’T GIVE A SHIT ABOUT.

How is she supposed to feel about that? She knows why you’re talking to her. She knows you fancy her and want to get into her pants. So why are you being so idiotic about it, trying to hide it and trying to pussyfoot around the whole issue? Faffing about and being inauthentic is very unattractive. And you ARE being inauthentic if you’re talking about the things you don’t care about, just to talk to her.

So you first need to come to terms with what you really want — You want to have a sexual relationship with the girl you’re approaching directly.

So what should you do?

You need to be direct with her about this, but you need to do it the right way.

And what’s the right way?

It’s pretty simple – you tell her, in no uncertain terms, that you find her attractive. And that you’d like to go on a date with her to get to know her better and see if there’s any connection. And then if the date goes well, that you’d really want to share some amazing orgasms together.

That said, you can’t just walk up to her and say something overtly sexual. But you can express interest from the start without being desperate by being open about what you want and alluding to the intriguing possibility of something sexual.

Prime example of being direct with women the right way

I’ve literally ran up to a woman at a shopping mall and said things like “Hey, you’re gorgeous! Do you have a boyfriend? A husband? No? Then let’s go for drinks this Saturday because I think you’re fine as hell and I want to get to know you better. And who knows where it all leads… What’s your number?”

This is the perfect example of being very direct with women when you’re trying to pick them up and seduce them.

It can even be as simple as saying: “Hey, you look amazing. Do you have a boyfriend? No? We should get together sometime.” Followed by “When are you available?” or “What’s better for you, this Friday or Saturday?” or something like that.

You can be as creative as you want. For bonus points, be playful, challenging, tease her and have fun with it.

However, doing this will work REALLY WELL for some people – and go VERY BADLY for others.

So what makes the difference?

Your success will depend on your level of game: How good your social skills are, how good you are at pickup, seduction, and inner game (mental skills).

That’s because this type of approach is incredibly polarizing. The girl will either want what you’re offering or not. You don’t faff about trying to “sneak your way” into spending time with her, hoping that someday maybe she’ll want to have sex with you. Instead, you present yourself right then and there, openly, on a silver platter with your intriguing proposal.

Notice the words “intriguing proposal.” You’re not doing this in a needy or desperate way, which would be massively unattractive and an instant turn-off. Which would make it a very bad example of being direct with a woman.

Why this will work for some and not for others

In short, being direct with a girl like you see in the examples above will ONLY WORK if you have good body language, attitude, mindsets, a strong frame, and are doing it in a masculine and non-needy way.

That’s why I say that being direct with women is best for advanced guys.

They have their shit together and know how to communicate man to woman the right way. Their whole demeanor, subconscious communications and way of saying the above will BUILD ATTRACTION ON ITS OWN. And once there’s a spark of attraction, the woman is significantly more likely to SAY YES to your proposal and go on a date with you.

But if you lack game – if you have shitty self-esteem, your inner game is in shambles, your body language is weird, and you’re not confident about what you’re doing – the above opener WILL NOT BUILD ATTRACTION. And the woman will reject you 99% of the time. So you should try being indirect with women instead, until you get better.

Fact is, most women are extremely flattered when you approach them in a direct manner and say what you want. If you’re doing it right and they have a boyfriend or husband, they’ll often apologize for not being able to go out on a date with you. But they’ll still feel flattered and happy you made your move and respect you for it.

That’s because the vast majority of women are sick and tired of their romantic prospects and interests beating around the bush all the time, making nice “small talk” and trying to be their “friend.”

Once again, women aren’t stupid. They want to have sex just as much, if not more than men do. Because women get much more pleasure from sex than men do.

How To Approach In a Direct way

So how do you approach a woman in a direct way?

Well, I’ve already written an article about 5 direct and cute ways to ask a girl out on a date. And in that article, I make it a point to show you that the lines you say don’t really matter.

Approaching women with respect and clear non-platonic interest is all about authenticity, presence and empathy.

You need to own your desire and appreciate how the girl’s presence affects you. As in, you’re approaching a girl who you find attractive, so it’s obvious her presence has an affect on you. Don’t deny it and own it.

However, remember that she’s NOT RESPONSIBLE for your feelings! She can accept or reject your advances, and that has nothing to do with you personally since she doesn’t really even know you.

The only thing you can do is communicate your intentions honestly, while respecting her boundaries and her response. Whatever it is, positive or negative.

You need to understand that her reaction to your approach is NOT a measure of your worth as a person. It’s all about her and her journey.

When you keep this in mind, you can use every single approach as an opportunity for PERSONAL GROWTH. Because it lets you reflect on your behavior and the responses you get from women.

Your approach can be as simple as walking up to a woman with a warm smile, while making strong eye contact and saying things like “Hey, I’m so and so. I couldn’t help but notice you and wanted to introduce myself.”

Your words aren’t the most important thing when approaching. It’s all about the energy and vibe you are holding as you connect with her as one human being to another.

And if you don’t have a need for her to respond in any particular way, you’ll go far. As long as you show genuine interest, honest warmth and intent, and present a good vibe and energy.

Advantages And Benefits Of Being Direct With Women You Want To Date

There are many advantages in being direct with women and telling them what you want and what you’re thinking.

It’s not about convincing women to like you when you’re being direct. It’s about being attractive and fun from the beginning of the interaction.

Main Benefit: The direct approach saves you time and effort.

If she likes you, she’ll let you know. If she doesn’t, then backing away further and faffing about as a way of conveying false disinterest is only going to hurt your chances. Especially and particularly if you’re approaching women in bars and clubs.

That’s because if you’re walking up to a girl in a bar or night club, then you’re wasting your time by pretending you don’t want her.

Women know what you’re up to when you’re approaching them during night game. In clubs, time a man approaches a woman, she immediately turns on her social sensors and analyzes him and his behavior. Unless, of course, she’s completely oblivious and doesn’t have much social sense or skills herself.

So if you pretend you aren’t interested in her when you approach her in bars and clubs, she’ll know what you’re doing. She’ll see you’re “playing games” and are being disingenuous and inauthentic. And she’ll often think you’re being a pansy for beating around the bush.

If she sees this, then no amount of psychological manipulation, negs, and similar bullshit tactics will change her mind. Because a lot of the time the interaction will start feeling very contrived to the girl. And girls really hate insincerity.

Here’s what another dating coach says about being direct with girls

Here’s what @SashaDaygame has to say about being direct with girls:

Many women will be immediately turned on by you being confident enough to approach them in this manner. By showing that you’re man enough to express your true desires and intentions…. not only will she have more respect for you – she will furthermore appreciate your honesty. She will either tell you she’s not interested, agree to the date, or (in most cases) engage you in a conversation in order to determine whether or not she’s interested.

Either way – you manned up, told the truth, and laid it all out on the line – like a man. And that’s a great place to start!

• Balls points – as soon as you have the audacity to approach a woman and let her know what your TRUE intentions are – you get MASSIVE points for having the balls to do so. Very few men will approach women in this matter. If you don’t go back to acting like a wuss after this – this ALONE can get into bed with a beautiful girl!
• Women are instantly attracted to you – Most guys aren’t confident enough to approach directly unless they’re really drunk. By going up to a women and saying what you really feel you generate TONS of attraction in most women automatically.
• Stand out from other guys – By approaching directly, you’ll set yourself apart from all the guys who use cheesy pick-up lines or faff around with indirect nonsense
• No room for manipulation – Another great advantage with telling the truth is that it doesn’t leave room for you to be manipulated by women. How can you get stuck in the friend zone, buying her drinks and dinners when you’ve made it abundantly clear that you’re interested in a sexual relationship? You can’t.
• No more wasted time – Don’t waste time on women that aren’t interested. The faster you find out she’s not interested, the more time you have to talk to women who ARE interested. Fantastic! -Ever have a 30 minute conversation with a woman you were interested in, only to find out she had a husband/boyfriend? Or maybe she was a lesbian? Or just simply wasn’t interested ? I have – and it’s really annoying! When you let a woman know what you’re after she’s forced to let you know.
• Know what to say next – When you’re up front, you have to worry a lot less bout what to say next. If you know what you want, and THE WOMAN knows what you want – then you’ve always got something to talk about. You, and her, hooking up. You don’t have to worry so much about small talk because you KNOW where the conversation is leading.

Everything he says is pretty much true, except for the “you generate TONS of attraction automatically” part.

As I said before, this direct way of asking women out only builds massive attraction if you already have your shit together AND KNOW WHAT YOU’RE DOING.

So newbies who are new to game and don’t have any confidence, don’t trust themselves or have weak body language, are needy or desperate SHOULD NOT TRY THIS. Until they get better and fix those issues.

Or, I mean, sure, you can go ahead and try it. But temper your expectations and don’t expect great results right off the bat. Realize that you will get TONS OF REJECTIONS before you get better and someone accepts your approach.

So if you’re not afraid of being direct like this with like 100 women, then go for it. It’s the perfect way to get over fear of women.

If you can approach a large number of women and be direct with them, it will be a really good learning experience and it will quickly build you up as a person through this adversity. As long as you don’t feel wrecked and discourage by rejection after rejection.

The Disadvantages of Being Direct

Finally, let’s discuss some of the disadvantages of being direct.

The biggest problem with being direct is that it DISSIPATES SEXUAL TENSION.

Sexual tension is a very important thing in seduction that you should be paying attention to. And building and maintaining sexual tension is one of the keys to getting laid with women after your date.

You see, sexual tension is all about mystery, intrigue, will-he-won’t-he type of thoughts.

When the woman is attracted to you but doesn’t know that she’s won you over yet, she starts hoping she will. And if you play your cards right and raise the sexual tension by doing certain things you can read from my other articles. Then her attraction towards you will multiply very quickly. Sometimes up to the point where she’ll want to sleep with you then and there.

I’ve pulled women to bathrooms of cafes, shopping malls, aqua parks, and other places. And I did it all by spiking sexual tension to the extreme. So much so that the girl becomes very horny and wants to have sex with you right away.

So when you’re being very direct with women – you dissipate some of that sexual tension. Because the girl knows that she’s already won you over. And all mystery and tension evaporates.

So, once again, the question of if it’s better to be direct or indirect with women has a lot to do with your style of seduction. Whether you’re more mysterious, macho, humorous, intense, suave, playful, and so on and so forth. So keep this in mind.

Now let’s talk about being indirect when trying to seduce women.

Being Indirect With Women When Trying To Seduce Them is Great For Beginners

Now let’s talk about how to be indirect when seducing women.

Fact is, being indirect with women is mostly for beginners. I say mostly, because even guys who have great game will still face situations where being indirect is the optimal strategy.

For example, when the girl you want to seduce is with her parents. Or surrounded by co-workers – friends, her boss, or other people who might not think highly of her if she accepts your advances.

As I always say – there’s no one best approach and every different way of being with girls, whether it’s direct or indirect, is useful for some specific scenarios.

That said, one of the biggest reasons why most men shy away from the direct approach is because they’re afraid of rejection. And in order to avoid rejection and to save face, they choose the indirect approach.

I know, it’s EXTREMELY difficult to put yourself out there in front of people, be vulnerable, and tell them what you want and show them who you are. I know this quite well because this was a very long struggle for me.

But trust me, once you’re very good at seduction – you should opt for the direct approach the vast majority of the time. Simply because it’s superior when you have the skills, charm, charisma and confidence to pull it off.

Men who are genuinely unafraid of women and rejection will walk up to the first girl they find attractive and ask her out. They’ll say exactly what’s on their mind and ask for her number.

If she says no, they’ll walk away unaffected and go talk to some other girl who they like the look of. Eventually, they’ll hit gold.

Guys who are indirect will do the same but take 5 to 500 times longer.

What does it mean to be indirect with girls

Being indirect with girls when you’re trying to seduce them means not letting women know right away that you want to sleep with them.

It’s mostly about being social with women – having fun with them, joking around, covertly flirting, being vague about your intentions, and so on and so forth.

Basically, you spend time with a girl you’re interested in but don’t allude to the fact that you want her sexually.

The hope is that when you spend time with her, she’ll really enjoy your company and will start liking you. And let me tell you, if you know how to flirt, tease, ruffle women’s feathers playfully, while displaying some charm, wit and other attractive qualities – then women WILL enjoy your company and WILL like you.

Then, once you know the girl is into you, you don’t say stuff like “Your place or mine?” Instead, you invite her home for dinner, to watch some movie, or say some other “excuse” to get her to come home with you. And then you escalate physically and sexually and hopefully have some fun between the sheets.

The indirect opener doesn’t build attraction – the interaction does

Unlike the direct approach, the indirect opener doesn’t build attraction on its own. Because you’re simply walking up to a woman you’re interested in and being social with her.

That’s the crux of the indirect approach – women usually will have no idea if you’re just being friendly with them or if you want something more. If you do it right, that is, and don’t betray your intentions through your sub-communication, body language and other various micro expressions.

However, the overall approach of indirect interaction with women builds much more attraction than the direct one. And this happens mainly due to sexual tension, as I already mention above.

Once again, uncertainty builds much stronger tension than just making it known you’re interested in the girl right away.

When you get a woman thinking things like “does he or does he not like me?” it gets her thinking of you much more than she would if she already knew you were into her.

You’re still doing the same thing as with the direct approach: You’re flirting with her, teasing her, being challenging, displaying various attractive qualities, and escalating physically. But it hits different, and much harder if you never make it clear if you’re actually interested in her or not.

This is what a ton of daytime dramas and soap operas do. This is what drives women wild, if you can do it the right way.

My book on how to get laid on the first date is mostly about the indirect approach. Because if you learn how to do it right, it can be very consistent at raising attraction levels through the roof. And if you know how to properly escalate physically and sexually when attraction is high, you’ll get laid a LOT.

But the indirect approach also has flaws.

The Biggest Problem with the Indirect Approach

The biggest problem with the indirect approach is that it’s very difficult to transition to being sexual. Unless you really understand how attraction and seduction works, that is.

Most newbies who swear by the indirect approach often forget that you need to escalate and create sexual tension in order to seduce the girl in the end.

They spend too much time being indirect that the girl eventually thinks they’re too timid, weak and afraid. Or not very interested in the girl and are just leading her on, for fun. Or just want to be friends with her and aren’t interested in something sexual or romantic.

You see, at some point you still have to transition from being indirect to being sexual with the girl. Or you will PUT YOURSELF INTO THE FRIEND ZONE. The girl will give up hope on you and you will blow your chance.

That’s why it also takes a bit of skill to transition properly from someone who’s feigning disinterest to a viable sexual option.

That’s exactly where understanding of pickup and seduction comes in. And why we all learn game. To capitalize on those opportunities when we see that the girl likes you and make the right move to get together with her.

The difference between being direct and indirect

Here’s a good analogy of the whole thing: The difference between being direct and indirect with women is like the difference between a movie where you already know the ending and a movie that keeps you guessing.

When you’re direct, the girl knows the ending you have in mind. When you’re indirect, she’s not sure of the ending, and it keeps her guessing.

That’s why being indirect is more engaging, since you don’t really know how things will play out.

Many guys who are great with women are comfortable with both being direct and indirect.

Personally, I prefer to be direct when approaching women on the street, in shopping malls, bars, clubs, and more.

But I prefer to be indirect in most other cases. Sometimes even when I already see that the girl is already into me and there’s some existing attraction. Because I know how to really spike the sexual tension, a mysterious, exciting vibe, as well as arousal.

Furthermore, one of the BIGGEST ADVANTAGES to being indirect is CONSENT FOR SEX.

Once you know how to tease women really well and create sexual tension, you can get them to the point where they actually beg you for sex.

That’s right, once you’re good at seduction, some women will plead for sex because they become incredibly aroused and horny when with you.

Personally, I’ve had more sex with more women from being indirect. But that’s because it suits my style of seduction much better. Since my style is more about humor, teasing, being rakish, and more. But I’ve had pretty good success with being direct as well, when I see a great opportunity.

Final thoughts on being direct vs being indirect with the opposite sex

Being direct with women is honestly much more convenient and significantly easier. Because you don’t need to beat around the bush as much.

But being indirect is way better at making women go crazy from lust and arousal.

Both require great skill to pull off really well. And both can make you absolutely amazing with women.

The indirect way is better for beginners and people who don’t or can’t make great first impressions. Either because of looks, status, self-esteem, confidence, and similar things.

The direct way is significantly better for cold approaching women during the day. Because it justifies you running up to women to talk to them. While being indirect while cold approaching by asking for stuff like directions often makes for an awkward and weird transition into something romantic.

Moments like “Oh hey yeah I know I just asked for the time or directions, but now I somehow also want to talk to you for 20 minutes because of reasons??? Because I hope you’ll like me and give me your number???” Pretty strange if you’re not a great conversationalist.

It’s such a pain in the ass to pretend you just happened to be walking right next to the girl and needed to ask her for the time, or for directions, or because you felt like making some random comment about some situation you’re in. It’s incongruent, disingenuous, inauthentic.

But yeah, try both approaches as much as possible and get the necessary experience to understand what works and what doesn’t SPECIFICALLY FOR YOU.

That’s what experience does – it lets you find your personal style of seduction that’s perfect for your personality. And once you do, you’ll know if being direct with girls or being indirect is the right way for you. And when to use each.