What Is Sexual Tension Between Men and Women

Let’s talk about one of the most important things men need to understand when it comes to seducing women. Namely, what is sexual tension and why is it crucial to getting laid a lot.

There are a lot of misconceptions flying around this topic. So I’m gonna put it all to rest and explain exactly what sexual chemistry is, what causes it and what it feels like. And how and why it leads to sex if you do it right.

Make sure to read everything below because it can really change your interactions with women for the better.

What Is Sexual Tension?

Sexual tension, also known as sexual chemistry, is an intangible energy that can be felt between two people when they’re attracted to each other.

It’s a feeling of attraction and anticipation between two people, combined with a little bit of uncertainty and doubt. That’s where the tension part comes from.

It’s something that can easily lead to sex if both parties play their cards right. And it’s a huge part of sexual arousal.

It’s the clash of masculinity and femininity intertwined with unpredictability – and that clash creates the sexual tension.

What’s more, it’s the combination of being pulled toward someone. But also a feeling of resistance and restraint at the same time. Like you both WOULD want to jump each other’s bones, but you don’t want to make it very obvious to one another just yet.

And the more sexual tension there is between you two, the more charged and exciting the interaction becomes. Until it reaches a point where you’re both ready to tear each other’s clothes off. And have sex right then and there if the circumstances allow for it.

What does sexual tension feel like?

What sexual tension feels like is a bit difficult to explain, because it can be unique to each individual.

It feels something akin to conflict, but not really.

When there’s sexual tension between two people, it can be pretty intangible, subtle and unnoticeable to others. Or it can be really obvious and “in your face,” easily seen by everyone around. It all depends on the people involved and how they flirt and express their sexuality.

It can often be the case that the two people who experience sexual tension between them are completely oblivious to it happening. They just feel some weird attraction towards the other person they can’t explain.

woman shows what sexual tension is trying to stretch steel expanderOr only one of them understands what’s going on while the other is “feeling weird, tense and uneasy, but somehow aroused.” Especially if the people involved are young and inexperiened. While their peers may see it clear as day because it’s very obvious there’s some sexual chemistry flying around.

This may often even lead to other people joking about it or teasing the people involved. Especially when it happens in high school or college.

Most people describe it as a feeling of “electricity.” Because it also creates excitement and even anxiety. The good kind of anxiety, not where you’re having a panic attack. Namely, the “butterflies in your stomach” kind of anxiety.

When you feel sexual chemistry, it feels like you both want to be near the other person and also want them to stay away. Which creates conflicting emotions. Because it can sometimes feel like there’s a kind of “danger” being in their presence. A danger that you’ll be so turned on, you may lose control.

That said, real sexual tension is nearly always a POSITIVE thing. Even though it may sometimes feel like a negative thing.

Why is sexual chemistry important?

Sexual tension is important in seduction because it helps build anticipation and excitement for a potential sexual encounter. It gets the juices flowing and overrides people’s logical thinking, making it easy to give into their emotions, lust, and desire.

And as we all know, you can’t logically convice women to become attracted to you. Because attraction is not a choice, it’s an unconscious chemical reaction to incoming stimuli.

That’s exactly the reason why sexual chemistry is crucial in pickup and seduction. It affects people emotionally, at their core.

Sexual tension is also a key factor in maintaining a healthy and satisfying sexual relationship with your long term partner.

sexual tension between a couple in a furniture storeOne of the reasons why married people have less sex is because the sexual tension between them often erodes over time. Since there’s no more sense of mystery left in the relationship. And after many years together, you’ve seen pretty much everything about your spouse and they don’t excite you as much. Since sexual chemistry is a massive part of sexual arousal.

That’s why it’s important to keep up the sexual tension throughout your interactions with the people you want to have sex with. Because it helps keep long term relationships exciting and dynamic.

So what causes sexual tension?

One of the key elements of sexual tension is the sense of uncertainty and unpredictability.

The element of uncertainty, where the girl SUSPECTS you like her, but doesn’t know it 100%, is crucial.

This feeling drives women WILD and creates a LOT of conflicting emotions in them. And as we all know, emotions are massively important when it comes to sex. Which is why bad boys get laid a lot, by the way. Since they’re masters of evoking various emotions in women, both positive and negative.

This feeling of uncertainty can be ramped up insane levels. By playing hard to get, teasing women, being a little bit mysterious, or not giving away too much about oneself, for example.

Because if the girl learns that “she’s got you in the palm of her hand.” Or that she’s “won you over completely” and that you’ll do anything for her. The sexual tension will dissipate totally and ridiculously fast.

There won’t be any more excitement left for her. She knows she has you, the game is over, the tension is gone. And what does sexual tension mean to a woman? An emotionally charged, fun time 🙂

This is exactly why when you’re beginning to date a woman, she will lose attraction towards you instantly if you utter the words “I love you” too soon. Those words release the sexual tension completely and utterly when you say them at the wrong time.

The Dangers Of Sexual Tension

Now that you know what sexual tension is and how this chemistry affects women, there’s something else you must understand.

Read the following a few times and make sure to imprint it into your brain. Or you may end up having a really bad time:
Creating sexual tension should never come at the expense of the other person’s comfort.

It’s the difference between flirting and creating excitement with a woman or engaging in sexual harrassment.

there's a thin line between sexual tension and sexual harrassment

Plenty of guys misinterpret sexual tension as being very forward with women. Or saying crude, creepy, inappropraite and downright smutty things to women they’re interested in. Which almost never ends well.

There’s definitely a time and a place for all of that stuff. And it’s when the girl falls for you hard and wants to have sex with you badly. Then those words turn her on even more than before. Otherwise, it’s a complete and total turn-off.

You see, you’re supposed to build sexual tension SUBTLY and not directly. It’s all about innuendos, non-verbal cues, body language, prolonged eye contact, flirting, etc.

I already have an article on exactly how to create, build and maintain sexual tension. Read it as well so you know what I’m talking about!

Incidentally, this is precisely why pretty much 99% of women you match with on Tinder and Bumble, etc. will be COMPLETELY TURNED OFF if you ask for nudes or send dick pics right away. Because you instantly REMOVE sexual tension, uncertainty and mystery.

It’s ridiculous how many guys don’t understand this. And end up crying that “women only date jerks and assholes and not me!”

You’re far more likely to land a date and get together with a girl from an online dating app or website if you just stay cool and don’t become sexual right away.

Chemistry and sparks on the first date

Being sexually forward on a date right from the start is also a huge mistake and you musn’t confuse it with sexual chemistry.

That’s why you shouldn’t jump straight into being sexual or trying to create sexual tension right away when you meet the girl. She must first make sure you’re not some maniac or sexless/lustful loser who will bang anything that moves. She has to trust you and be comfortable around you to want to sleep with you.

Sexual tension is just one part of the date, it’s not the end all be all thing. And to be successful with women, you must understand this and know that there’s a right and a wrong time to building sexual tension. As well as a right way and a wrong way.

Luckily, I’ve written a fool-proof guide book on how to consistently get laid on the first date with women. Which explains exactly what you have to do from start to finish, including when and how to utilize sexual chemistry to your advantage. So you’re guaranteed to have an amazing first date, pretty much every time.

Get it today, risk free, and soon you’ll be able to get as many serious or casual sexual relationships with women as you want. I guarantee it!


saulisdating Written by:

Andrius Saulis has over 15 years of extensive hands-on experience and expertise in the field of Dating, Seduction, Relationships and Social Dynamics. He's helping men all around the world get rid of their insecurities, regain their high self-esteem and confidence, and become successful with women. He teaches men how to attract and seduce women not through manipulative tactics, but by being their genuine, authentic and charming selves, while exuding a flirty, confident and sexy vibe that women can't get enough of. Learn how to have a flawless first date with The Saulis Dating Guide to get as many serious or casual relationships as you want.

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