If you’re often wondering “Why do women like bad boys and prefer them to nice guys?” then I’ll help you out.
This is a very in-depth guide about what makes bad boys so incredibly attractive to women and how YOU can take some of the best characteristics of these men and use them to become much more successful with girls.
I’ll answer the question of “What is a bad boy?” and explain everything about why women love bad boys in as much detail as possible. I’ll also sprinkle some of my best secrets throughout the article! Plus, I’ll list many core reasons why most girls will not respect nice guys or even give them the time of day, instead choosing to go out with men who aren’t so “nice”. So, be sure to read the entire post if you truly want to know the underlying reason behind this phenomenon.
Yes, I’m aware it’s very, very lengthy. But it can very well change your whole life if you read and understand everything here and then take the necessary steps to apply the knowledge.
In fact, I promise you that if you read it all and prevent yourself from making the mistakes that I’m going to mention below – you’ll get laid much more often than you do now!
But here’s the really condensed version of the whole thing, bad boy vs nice guy:
So why do women like bad boys, exactly?
Before you find out, you should know that most people’s whole concept of “bad boys” is usually WRONG.
A very common misconception is thinking that bad boys get all the girls because they’re “bad” or treat women like shit. That’s entirely not true! They get women because they push for it and escalate mercilessly and unabashedly. They have the audacity to try and try again, and they often succeed.
The main misconception that “bad boys” are bad people is deluded and a complete myth. That’s because the vast majority of girls do not like bad men or bad people in general. Which means the whole label is bullshit, to begin with . . .
“Bad boys” don’t treat women badly because they want to. They simply do whatever the hell they want. They follow their own path in life and sometimes people around them get unintentionally hurt as a result, mostly as a side effect. It’s one of the reasons why women like bad boys, but not the main one.
If there was actually a guy who’d treat women bad because he WANTED to, he would not be a “bad boy”. He’d simply be a malicious person in general, and a prick that most women would not want anything to do with. So, don’t treat women bad just for the sake of it because it will quickly backfire.
So what is a bad boy? Someone who doesn’t conform to approved standards of behavior, doesn’t give a damn about what others think of him and does what he wants.
Here’s what really makes bad boys so attractive!
The REAL and the most fundamental reason why women like bad boys is very simple: They elicit a STRONG EMOTIONAL RESPONSE from women with their actions and words.
And that’s it. That’s the entire mind-blowing secret as to why most women will find this type of man extremely and utterly attractive and why girls like bad boys in general. It’s the reason why they’ll sleep with such a man at the drop of a dime and then fall in love with him. It’s the reason why they’ll have threesomes and foursomes and whatever else you can think of with a guy like that. Basically, women will have sex with such a man all the time, whenever he wants to because of the way he makes them FEEL.
But that’s just the core thing; there are many other reasons why women like bad boys. I’ll explain them all below but they all come back to that one fundamental principle – ELICITING STRONG EMOTIONS.
Why? Because when a woman is attracted to a man, and I mean truly attracted and turned on, she often doesn’t know why and feels uncomfortable because of this. Science says that the physiological signs of attraction and agitation are indistinguishable. That’s because when you cause various strong emotions in people, you effectively agitate them. Whether they then feel fear, anxiety or attraction due to the agitation which is stirred by the emotions you made them feel depends entirely on the context and the situation.
When a woman becomes attracted to you on a gut instinct level, her heart starts racing, her pupils widen, her muscles tense up, she gets that pit-of-the-stomach feeling and also becomes a little lightheaded. You know what else causes that? You guessed it; many other negative states, like fear, anxiety, worry. She will feel uncomfortable and will naturally seek to alleviate her discomfort by shit-testing you and seeing if you’ll crumble under the pressure. If you don’t fail the shit-tests, she’ll relieve that anxiety and agitation by having sex with you because it will effectively give her the validation she’ll crave from you.
Incidentally, if you have no idea what shit-tests are and why they’re massively important to getting laid with women, be sure to read how to pass any and all shit tests that women throw at you!
So, now that we understand what happens when women become attracted and why ELICITING STRONG EMOTIONS in women is key to seducing them, we can talk about why women like bad boys so much.
This anxiety is exactly the reason why things like the Push/Pull dynamic works wonders when it comes to attracting beautiful women. “Pushing” women away goes right to the center of their self-image, agitates them, and makes them feel various strong emotions. When you are pushing her away, you are instilling that good anxiety that women need to feel to become aroused.
However, you should not think of Push/Pull as a PUA technique or a tactic that you should use indiscriminately and with little foresight. Instead, if you want to consistently attract women, proper Push/Pull should be a lifestyle.
In fact, during my interactions, I’ve learned to be naturally challenging to women. I do around 80-90% of pushing during my conversations, which gets me beyond excellent results. Why? Because I am making the girl I’m meeting uncomfortable and agitated (yet not in a creepy way, but an assertive, masculine, and playful way which shows I’m not desperate, needy, and that I’m amusing myself), eliciting very strong emotions in her as a result. And guess what? She needs to get out of that state by getting fucked by me later.
Incidentally, this is why I love playfully teasing girls when I’m with them and why I think it’s one of the most important skills to master in seduction.
But I’m getting ahead of myself. Here are more reasons why women like bad boys and find them so insanely attractive:
Why do “Nice Guys” Fail?
First of all, let me preface this section by saying that there are genuinely legit nice guys who are simply nice, kindhearted and warm people. They usually lack success with women because they are introverted and not very confident when talking to women. All they need to do is learn how to trust themselves more, raise their self-esteem and get some experience socializing with women.
With that said, there are self-proclaimed “Nice Guys” out there, who are definitely anything but nice. And why do these “Nice Guys” fail? Mostly because they are dishonest and don’t respect women!
In fact, a lot of guys are outright RUDE to women when they get rejected and show that they can’t take rejection as a man.
Quite a few guys even expect women to want to fuck them just because they are being nice to them. They can’t distinguish simple friendliness from sexual interest. There are a lot of things wrong with this mentality.
I have tons of these examples.
But that’s not the only reason why nice guys fail. A nice guy’s actions can often be interpreted by women as an attempt to buy their affection. He thinks he must “do certain things” or “prove his worth” for women to like him. He internally believes that girls are not going to like him simply for who he is so he has to compensate for that with external things. Also, such a guy often hides the fact that he likes women sexually.
As a result, the actions of such a man are very often incredibly dishonest.
A guy like that pretends that he’s not interested in attractive women when talking to them – even though he is. And then he’s surprised when women become really confused by his actions and intentions.
He’s very often afraid that women will figure out his “secret” – that he wants them sexually and that he’d want to fuck their brains out, right then and there. But how are women supposed to know what he wants from them? They can’t read minds. If a guy acts nice and expects sex in return – he’s delusional. That’s how you make friends, not lovers!
In effect, he is NOT being his authentic self – he is being dishonest and he hides himself and his true intentions from women.
Essentially, what that says about a man is that he’s afraid to live life, afraid that other people will judge him. He puts too much weight on other people’s opinions about himself.
This shows that he does not have his shit together, is not secure in himself, and has severe self-esteem issues. No wonder then that he keeps wondering why girls like bad boys and not him!
Also, nice guys often say that women are shallow when in fact it’s the guy himself who’s incredibly superficial:
Here’s another example:
It’s funny how “nice guys” complain that women don’t give them the time of day if they look bad. They don’t spend the necessary time to go exercise and develop their bodies but expect hotties to date them. When in turn, they would NEVER give a fat or ugly woman their time of day as well. Hypocrisy at its best.
All in all, most Nice Guys are effectively lying to the woman they talk with. There is incongruence between their thoughts, words, and actions. This incongruence shows the girl that although he likes her, he lacks self-confidence, assertiveness, craves her validation and wants an intact ego more than he wants the actual girl.
And that’s not the worst part. A lot of guys put women on pedestals, thinking that they’re these perfect beings who need worship, kissing up to, pleasing all the time, etc. That is effectively OBJECTIFYING women and not considering them as human beings and as equals. Which is incredibly sad and makes women lose all respect for the guys who do this.
That’s what so refreshing about badboys and one of the most important reasons why women enjoy the company of bad boys so much. These men fully realize that women are just like you and me – that they’re normal people who eat, shit, breathe, sleep, fart, burp, and fuck to survive. As a result, “bad boys” never put women on pedestals and instead talk to them like normal people. That’s why women like them so much, love them and adore them and want to have sex with them. But “nice guys” see this sort of behavior from “bad men”, go apeshit and yell to themselves “HOW DARE THEY DISRESPECT MY PRINCESS?!” and falsely label these badboys as assholes and jerks.
So, if you do this, I have some bad news for you. You are not really a nice guy . . . Sorry, someone had to tell you this. But don’t worry if you happen to be like the person I described above because I’m here to help you change. But you really have to take some time to look at yourself in the mirror, reflect on your personality and your mindsets, and WANT to change.
Now let’s talk about something else that’s important.
Honesty and Authenticity
Bad boys are HONEST and AUTHENTIC in their actions and purpose. They don’t hide their intentions when it comes to women, they have no problems letting the girl know that they want her sexually and they don’t say stuff just to impress the girl because they simply don’t care and are not afraid of losing her!
Bad boys also tend to effortlessly and unconsciously exude certain attractive character traits like dominance, confidence, indifference, directness and decisiveness, masculinity, and so on.
I’ll explain all of this in detail below.
But now let’s look at the “Nice guy”. It’s another bullshit label, but let’s roll with it for a second.
Have you noticed that the really attractive women never seem to be attracted to nice guys?
Just like me in the past, I’m sure you’ve had attractive female friends that always seemed to date various “jerks”, “assholes”, and “bad boys”. But for some reason, they were never romantically interested in you.
So why is that?
The answer is simple: As a contrast to adventurous men that badboys tend to be, nice guys are boring. And I do mean excruciatingly and thoroughly boring!
They also give all of their power away when talking to girls and try to impress all the time. Then they keep asking “Why do women like bad boys so much!?” in exasperation even though it’s all pretty obvious.
So how do you avoid the Nice Guy Trap and attract women like bad boys do?
Pretty simple: You must stop filtering your true thoughts and beliefs in an attempt to impress women or tell them what you think they want to hear.
You must also develop rock-solid standards and boundaries.
When women sense and realize that you are stuck in your head filtering your words, they lose the feeling that they can fully trust what you say. They then realize that your emotions are dependent on their validation – and that’s never attractive!
Men should be in control of their emotions. They shouldn’t act like girls (read: pussies!) because women don’t want a girl near them. Instead, women want a man who is secure in himself and is stable.
On the other hand, when women sense that your emotions do not depend on their validation, approval, or similar things, an enormous amount of pressure is instantly lifted from your interactions. You’ll both be free to enjoy each other’s company.
Through removing one’s filters and ceasing to seek approval and not acting needy, you will gain the trust and respect of most women. In general, women will more often than not be intrigued by your authenticity and honesty, rather than get upset that you don’t share the same exact opinions as they do.
So why do women like bad boys in this instance? Exactly because of the fact that they do not filter their words and thoughts. That is what bad boys excel at, and that lack of filter naturally creates tons of emotions with anyone who they interact with! Ladies like a guy who is an “asshole” simply because he communicates honest signals, without a filter and never tries to seek someone’s approval and validation. And not because he actively insults women.
A guy like that does not try to impress. He just does whatever he wants to do and doesn’t give a shit. He is simply being true to himself, his own path in life and to his nature – a genuine, honest, and authentic man.
Women can trust that he will not be putting on some type of act in front of them to “get them”. Women can trust that the man in front of them who they’re getting to know is actually who he says he is.
Nice guys are predictable
Nice guys are also very predictable – and where’s the fun in that? Where’s the fun for a woman in going on a date with a guy and knowing exactly how he’s going to treat her, what he’s going to do, and what he’s going to say? The nice guy is going to be like the other 50 guys that a desirable girl went on a date with and promptly forgot because she didn’t get moved or engaged by them at all. She felt no emotions.
And here’s one more thing to consider. Most Nice Guys are irrationally nice to women, meaning that they invest too much in the girl early on and show more affection and much more attention than the girl rationally deserves from them. The Greek philosopher Plato said that emotional love is a kind of madness. When things are going well – you’re irrationally nice to the person out of proportion to what they deserve. When things are going badly, you’re irrationally nasty to the person out of proportion to what they deserve. Women know that when you are irrationally nice to them – you will eventually be irrationally shitty to them. They don’t want that.
So here’s the real deal:
Women don’t base their choice of men on how nice they are. They choose the men they do because they feel a gut level attraction to them. And the only thing that truly attracts women are your abilities to make them feel various emotion. Any and all emotions – yes, even a few and occasional bad ones!
The easiest and best way to get into any woman’s pants, and in fact into their minds so that they will totally adore you, is by taking them on an Emotional Ride. Because emotions are addicting!
Now, prepare for a rant about nice guys vs bad boys!
This bullshit boils my blood whenever I see it since it’s the reason why most men are utterly incompetent and unsuccessful with women.
Why are women so enamored with bad boys? Well, why do you think most “nice guys” whine about being “oh so nice” to women, about treating them well, doing everything in their power for their date to be “as perfect as can be” and constantly being afraid to fuck up? After that, they’re then baffled when those same women don’t like them or even give them the time of day and instead choose a “bad guy” who may treat them badly, cheat on them and so on.
Do you realize what an absolute emotional roller-coaster a “bad boy” can shove a girl through?
That emotional roller coaster is worth the occasional negative emotion. And in fact, those negative emotions do wonders for attraction because they come at unpredictable times, just when she least expects them. Those emotions are mostly unintentional because “bad boys” just don’t give a damn, which is one more reason why women like bad boys!
Those emotions are so incredibly addictive that the girls can’t help themselves but swoon over a guy like that, no matter if he sometimes treats them objectively badly. It’s like a Drug, and he’s the Dealer.
He can make a girl Laugh, then turn around and makes her Cry, make her Scared, make her Doubtful, but then turn around and make her Happy, make her feel Sexy, Appreciated. Then he can turn around and make her Panic, then turn around again and make her Giddy with Joy, then say something sexual to make her Horny – and so on and so forth. That girl will jump his bones any time he wants to.
He brings emotions in spades, every single time the girl is with him. Such a guy is rarely predictable and never boring and women respond massively and positively to it because it’s like living in a soap opera or a romantic novel to them!
Emotions are the only drug that women massively respond to. And if you can do this – you’ll be phenomenally successful with women.
Some guys can do this naturally, some guys learn this. But if you can spike a girl’s emotions and can provide this drug – you’re gonna be golden with the vast majority of girls and get laid as much as you want. I know I do. And that’s why I never have to ask “Why do girls like bad boys so much?” because I already know that it’s all about how you make women FEEL and not what you own, how you look, or anything else about you. If you understand this, you will notice many signs a girl likes you when you go on dates and you’ll just have to make your move to get laid easily.
What’s wrong with nice guys? Why are nice guys unattractive?
Here are some other reasons why women like bad boys and don’t respect “white knights”:
Like I said before, a typical Nice Guy is utterly predictable. He’s going to only treat women one way, which is boring. He’s only going to say things that won’t offend or hurt them. He’s also never going to ruffle their feathers, even if as a joke because he thinks that they’re going to leave him for it or become unhappy. A guy like that is afraid of losing girls because of his actions or words. He’s desperate to keep her and will be walking on eggshells the entire time!
For the love of all that’s good – Don’t be afraid to have a woman be mad at you!
So many men are wrongly terrified of the consequences of having a woman be mad at them. That’s so sad, and incredibly ironic because there are no consequences of having a woman be a little mad at you because you didn’t give her what she wanted. And if you do it right, there are only benefits! So, don’t hold back when you want to tell her she is doing stupid shit!! Then man the fuck up and stand your ground when she inevitably shit-tests you, by learning how to deal with them. However, this all requires you to create solid and healthy boundaries, and then to enforce them. To learn how to do that, sign up for my newsletter to get the Inner Game Course for free. The first lesson is about BOUNDARIES.
So, a nice guy is afraid of stirring emotions in a woman. A nice guy is unsure of himself, he is not confident in himself, and always in self-doubt.
And self-doubt is among one of the WORST qualities any person can possess. This perpetual self-doubt will destroy any man’s chances with women!
How can a date with such a guy ever be exciting? How can he strongly attract a girl if he just sits there and reports about his day and asks her all the questions the other 50 guys before him have asked her?
How can a nice guy get anywhere with a desirable woman, one who has many potential suitors? If he’s just like the grey masses who are afraid to speak their mind without fear of being judged and who can’t stand up for themselves and reveal their personalities?
Fear of revealing yourself and your personality
And that’s another key issue – “nice guys” are afraid to reveal their personalities. But you have to understand that without showing your personality, you will NEVER attract a mature, stable and secure girl.
Women with strong personalities also want a man with a strong personality. It’s as simple as that!
Because what’s there to like about a guy who’s afraid of other people seeing him for who he is? If he’s afraid to speak up because he thinks people will think badly of him and that people will judge his every thought, then he’s got massive self-esteem issues and insecurities. He is afraid to live life! No self-respecting woman in her right mind will ever respect such a boy!
And I say boy, because he is NOT a man. He needs to mature, invest in himself and develop himself until he becomes one!
People are ALWAYS going to judge others, no matter what you say or do. It’s just a fact of life. Some people judge subconsciously, but they still make judgments about others because it’s a survival mechanism that lets people quickly see if someone they’re talking to is not a maniac, weirdo or some creep. It’s seeing if someone is worth talking to or if you should run away from them.
And nice guys don’t realize this; they always try to “play it safe”. And safe can be many things, even good ones – but safe is NEVER ATTRACTIVE!
And this is the inherent problem – most nice guys elicit no emotions because they want to stay safe. They’re afraid of getting out of their comfort zones.
Or if they do elicit emotions, those are very few and of a single spectrum.
Yes, I’ll repeat this point about not being able to elicit emotions again and again because too many guys are utter morons when it comes to women, for failure to realize this point. But it’s not their fault – and it’s not YOUR fault if you’re guilty of doing this. The truth is that many men who fail with women simply haven’t been educated in sexual dynamics, and about how attraction and seduction works, and that’s why they end up asking everyone “Why do women like bad boys so much and not me?”
They have also been conditioned to deceive themselves about how intimate relationships should function and to generally hide their own feelings of dissatisfaction from themselves.
This could all be turned around if only more people realized how important emotions are when it comes to the art of attraction and seduction.
Why are emotions important in seduction?
Emotions are what drive people. Emotions are the currency of attraction, seduction, se, and satisfaction. People do things for one reason and one reason only – to change the way they feel.
People are literally driven to action by emotions, and that’s why strong emotions are exactly why girls love bad boys!
Why do you think people like dramas so much? Even stupid and illogical daytime dramas that are watched by millions of housewives around the world. Those women are hoping and pleading internally that some guy will come along and make them feel something. Anything, even if that something is a bad emotion. Why do women like bad boys then, after watching these shows and reading tons of romance novels?
Because they want adventure in life, not boredom – and bad boys can provide that in spades!
Women crave emotions but usually don’t get as much of them as they want. Their boring husband comes home and the whole deathly-boring routing starts all over again. “Hi honey, yes honey, you’re right honey, I’ll take the kids honey, anything you want honey, is there anything to eat honey?” Then he dispassionately kisses his wife, watches TV or spends hours on his PC and goes to sleep, only to repeat the same boring routine all over again tomorrow!
Where are the emotions in that?!
While this kind of life is nice, safe, and stable, it will not make your wife have the hots for you! It will not stir her emotionally and especially SEXUALLY.
But then a bad boy comes along, says to her “Fuck this, let’s do that instead, what the fuck are you doing? Go suck my dick instead!” and guess what happens next? That same boring husband comes home to find them banging in his bed . . .
But the bad boy doesn’t say these things intentionally, it’s just what he naturally does because he’s unafraid and doesn’t care. He also doesn’t judge that women are sleeping with him right away. He doesn’t judge their personality, fetishes, wet dreams and kinkiness. Instead, he EMBRACES all of that – and the results speak for themselves.
That’s another important reason why women like bad boys and why they’re so attractive. Such a man does his own thing, doesn’t give a fuck about what others think, has concrete boundaries that he will fight tooth and nail for; and that drives people crazy. It drives women crazy by stirring their emotions, agitating them; and that’s why they want to sleep with such a man.
And guess what? Do you think nice guys don’t judge a woman’s sexuality? They do, and that’s where slut-shaming comes from. And that’s exactly why women hide their sexual side from their boring “friends” – because they’ll get judged to shit for it.
But that’s another topic for another time. Join my newsletter to find out how changing your mindset and being non-judgmental about sex will bring you more casual sex than you can ever handle! It’s another crucial reason behind why women like bad boys and why girls enjoy their company so much.
So what is a bad boy, exactly?
Let’s see a standard representation of a typical bad boy:
Pretty accurate, right? When people think of “bad boys” they may picture something like this.
So why do you think girls like bad boys who have this kind of look?
Well, do you know why a girl will swoon over a guy like that? Do you know why she’s going to get wet and horny just at the thought of him?
Don’t get me wrong, women won’t think that he’s going to make a good boyfriend, husband or partner for them. In fact, they don’t know or even think that he’s a great guy or even a good person in general. They may even consider him to be a somewhat bad person! But they don’t care – because they know that dating and being with such a guy is not going to be boring!
Women will knowingly go into a relationship with such a guy, even if just as a fuckbuddies relationship. Because they know they’re going to have a fun and emotional time with such a guy. Also, because he isn’t going to be judgmental when it comes to sex and she’ll be free to enjoy her sexuality with him. In any event, it’s all going to be an ADVENTURE, even if it’s a scary one at first.
Again, that’s the whole secret behind why women like bad boys. And this has nothing to do with the guy’s looks, too! He may as well be fat and unshaven, but if he gives the vibe of being a “bad boy who can spike my emotions” – a woman’s going to be sold on that.
Don’t believe me? Well, it’s all based on actual SCIENCE.
Research done by Schachter & Singer, showed in their psychological studies that when their subjects became agitated and then approached by an attractive confederate (person who is in on the whole thing and is part of the research, but test subjects don’t know this) – they rated them as more attractive than the control group of unagitated persons did.
Another study done by Dutton & Aron had subjects cross a scary suspension bridge over a 230-foot chasm. The control group crossed a sturdy cedar bridge over a small gurgling stream; in this case fear resulted in higher attraction toward the confederate.
So, take women who may be somewhat attracted to you on a scary or exciting adventure; and they will become MUCH MORE attracted to you!
Take women on dates that include physical activities, or to places where the environment is exciting, loud, and very fun. This will create lots of emotions and will agitate them. Or, if you’re more advanced, you can take women on a simple coffee date, if you know how to elicit those strong emotions YOURSELF!
Why bad boys elicit strong emotional responses in women
This is the biggest truth I’ve realized in 10 years of learning attraction, seduction and being successful with women.
Emotions are the currency, and whoever can bring them will be knee deep in pussy.
I can rant about this all day, I can write a whole book about the particular topic of why women like bad boys. But I’m not sure that it will do any good since people tend to return to their comfort zones if someone doesn’t give them a swift kick in the rear. I have another book, about how to consistently get laid on the first date, which shows how you can take all of the attractive qualities of “bad boys” for yourself and focuses on self-improvement and learning how to be authentic, genuine and naturally attractive to women. While also taking the best bits of bad boy personality into play to create tons of emotions on your dates.
Even merely writing about this shit makes ME emotional, and that’s the exact reason why I like this subject so much and why I do this. So it’s not only women who are addicted to emotions – everyone is.
The most powerful people in the world are those who can easily manipulate the emotions of others and use them to their advantage. These people can make you do ANYTHING; take Trump as an example and notice how he used emotions to get elected. So, why not apply this knowledge to be successful with women?
That is exactly what “bad boys” do, naturally. And that’s why girls like them so much!
But ultimately, these adventurous men are just a fantasy. A fantasy of an adventurous life with an adventurous person. That’s not inherently right or wrong because who wouldn’t want to live an adventurous life?
And you know what? Nice guys can become adventurous, too. It’s all about learning how and about self-improvement in general. You can learn how to develop a bad boy personality and characteristics, without all the negative connotations normally associated with these individuals and without turning into a jerk by studying my material.
I was utterly incompetent around women once. I was a virgin for a long time and now I’ve had more sex than most men on the planet can ever hope to get, with the most beautiful girls from all over the world.
How did I do that? By incorporating all the positive bad boy personality traits into myself, while leaving out all the abusive and negative bullshit. I took out the most important reasons why girls like bad boys so much and have made them a part of me.
And I can show you how to do that in a very easy and quick way.
How to stop being an emotional mute – THIS IS ESSENTIAL
A huge part of the problem is that many people have low self-esteem and a ton of insecurities. Particularly, too many guys pay too much attention to what other people think of them.
And that’s the crux of the issue, really. If you care too much what other people think of you – you’ve already lost. Because your actions will always be affected by others and not you alone. If you care too much about what others think of you, you will not be able to express yourself and your personality to people who you interact with!
You need to learn how to simply not give a fuck! But that’s not an easy thing to achieve if you don’t know how to develop this mindset. For that, I suggest that you sign up for my INNER GAME course!
In any case, you’re living on a planet with over 7.5 Billion people. If you’re afraid to speak your mind and show who you are because you think others will judge you for it, then you need to realize a couple of things about life. Mostly, that judgment is entirely unavoidable in any society – and that no matter who you are, no matter what you do, and what you have going on in your life – SOME PEOPLE ARE SIMPLY NOT GOING TO LIKE YOU!
Why would you then try to do right and be liked by EVERYONE, if you know that it’s impossible to do that and is inherently a FOOL’S ERRAND? Something that’s unachievable and a total waste of your time and energy!
The ability of not giving a shit about other’s opinions is another great reason of why do women like bad boys so much.
Without the ability to freely and fully express yourself without fear, you will not get far in life. You’ll live, you may get a decent job, maybe a girlfriend who also has some issues of her own and is also insecure because she’s interested in YOUR insecure ass. Then you’ll have some kids with her, work work work, grow old, and die without having lived all that much.
If that kind of life is for you, then by all means, you can go and do it. But it just seems so mediocre, that’s all. Why settle for a girl that you can barely get, who is a mess herself, instead of manning the fuck up, developing yourself as a person, and then being able to choose the most compatible and beautiful girl that you meet and go on a date with? One who complements your relationship instead of depending on you. A woman who understands you along with your values. Knows what drives you, gets your ambitions and likes your virtues. And then you build a better life together with her. Why then not have confident and virile children with her? Children who are also secure in themselves and grow up to be good people. Why not choose the job or business that suits you best – and enjoy a fulfilling life, and flourish?
Because if you’re a “nice” guy who’s afraid of other people, you’re by extension afraid of life, that’s why!
But FEAR happens only because you imagine a bad outcome. SO, STOP IMAGINING THINGS! You’re not a psychic, you don’t know what’s going to happen when you approach beutiful women. So just focus on thinking positive thoughts, like “Well, she looks great, so I’ll just come over, say Hi, and find out who she is!” Then go and do your thing and see what happens. Yes, sometimes you will fail and she’ll reject you because that’s just a simple fact of life and no one can have everything they want. But sometimes you won’t. And I like those odds! Those are better odds than ALWAYS failing because you don’t even approach!
Stop being afraid of life!
Right now, I’m guessing you probably can’t go up to that girl you like and speak your mind in a genuine and authentic manner. Because you think you’re unworthy or that she’ll reject you, or a thousand other reasons why it’s a bad idea. You can’t go to your boss and set things right, you can’t work on your idea and build it into something valuable. But WHY?
This may all sound like a pipe dream to you. Well, it may or may not be, but these things are certainly achievable! All you have to do to achieve them is demand change from yourself and start NOW. Decide for yourself that you’re going to take control of your own life and not remain passive. Decide for yourself that you’re going to get out of your comfort zone and be proactive!
Then invest in yourself, invest in your personality, develop your character, your attractive character traits, social skills, social confidence (which comes from experience) and go out into the world and get the things you want and deserve! And if you can’t do it alone, if you can’t find the material to change yourself on your own, then SEEK HELP.
Hell, if you want, you can even pay me to coach you and I’ll give it my best to build you from the ground up and turn you into a successful man who’s unafraid to live and who’s secure in himself. A man who takes care of himself, likes himself and who women love and adore as a result. But my 1-on-1 coaching is very expensive, so it’s not for everyone. Because I’m sure as hell not going to do it for free – I value my time 🙂
Or, you can find other coaches on the internet if you think I won’t be able to help you become a better man and figure out why women like bad boys, so that you can change your life. Point is, you’re living in the age of the internet, you have the knowledge of the whole world at your fingertips. SEEK HELP, and you will get it. There are many more people other than me who can help you – some better, some worse.
You can start learning all of this today so that you’ll never have to ask why do girls like bad boys so much and don’t give YOU any attention. But only if you actually decide to start and take positive action.
But let me reiterate the most important point here:
Some people will like you, others won’t!
This is a true fact of life. You can’t please everyone. That girl MAY reject you, but she also may not. If she does, that experience will be invaluable because you’ll learn and will be able to improve your next approach. If you learn, you’ll do better with another girl as a result of getting rejected by the first one, learning from it, and then using what you’ve learned to better yourself.
So the only way to stop being an emotional mute is to speak your mind to others. Try it for yourself, see how liberating it is and learn by doing. It’s one of the main reasons behind why women like bad boys so much; they understand that not everyone’s going to like them and they’re PERFECTLY FINE WITH IT.
You’ll quickly notice a change in your life, if you only dare to try. It takes a bit of courage to jump into that unknown world – but boy is it worth it!
You will be able to do stuff you previously couldn’t or didn’t DARE to. You’ll notice that you didn’t suddenly burst into flames when you spoke your mind and stood up for yourself; that you’ll live and even thrive when you see that people don’t care that you said something “shocking”. You may even find individuals who share your views on life and make some genuine friends as a result!
This all comes down to authenticity and being genuine with the people you meet. Clearly, that’s another reason why girls like bad boys and want them so much.
For example, when I approach women, I go in, say “Hi!” – and improvise. I rely on my personality, my wit and my sense of humor.
I don’t think of stuff like “Oh what If i say this and she doesn’t like it?” SO FUCKING WHAT? If she doesn’t like it, it means she just has different views than mine. I can then just say “Been fun chatting!” and move on to the NEXT girl until I find someone who does share those views. There are BILLIONS of people on this planet – you don’t have to waste your time on those who don’t understand you, and cry about being rejected. Simply because you can move on to the next one. That’s the abundance mentality that most coaches talk about.
And by being unabashedly direct like that, I never have problems with eliciting strong emotional responses from women.
You are living YOUR life, which you should live for yourself and NOT for other people!
That said, you have to develop your personality up to a point where you can actually RELY on it and on your sense of humor. That’s to become self-amusing when you talk to people, both guys, and girls. But that’s a whole another story for another time. You can join my newsletter to learn more about self-amusement and why it’s critical in spiking attraction in girls and making them want you.
Oh, and here’s something that will massively help you with that on dates:
You need to learn this if you want to elicit STRONG EMOTIONAL RESPONSES from girls on dates. This is a technique I personally use on nearly EVERY SINGLE DATE that gets me laid like there’s no tomorrow:
Why do women like bad boys who ruffle their feathers and tease them? Because these men can pull this technique off naturally, without even thinking about it. If you learn to do this technique and can consistently pull it off successfully, you will notice a ridiculous increase in your success rate on dates with women.
This technique is just one of my many trump cards. It takes the best parts from bad boys and incorporates that to make your dates incredibly fun and emotional for women.
Do yourself a huge favor and GET THIS HANDLED. Almost anyone can learn this, if they just get off their lazy ass and put some time and effort into it.
I have dozens of these techniques, most are in my book about getting laid.
Finally, to understand what I’m talking about and why girls like bad boys, take a look at the top mistakes that most nice guys make that completely destroy their chances with women on dates.
The Biggest Mistakes That Nice Guys Make With Women
These mistakes are to recap the main things that you need to avoid in order to be more successful with women.
1 – Nice guys are boring and talk to girls on dates like they are interviewing them!
“What did you study?”, “Where did you work?”, “What do you think of the weather?” – BORING.
Millions of guys go on dates and ONLY ask questions like “Oh hey, so where are you from originally?”, “So what is your dream job?“, “So why did you choose that college?“, “Where would you like to live?“, “Where would you like to go on vacation?“, “Are you from this town originally, or did you move here?“, or even about the fucking WEATHER!
And then they act surprised why the girl doesn’t have any feelings for them.
How can she have any feelings for someone who bores them half to death?
If all you do on a date is talk about stuff like this – don’t be surprised when girls don’t see you as anything more than a non-sexual friend.
Here’s what you can do on dates to NEVER seem as a boring man: What to do on a date with a girl and never be a boring man! (Opens in new window)
One of the reasons why women like and love bad boys is that they aren’t boring.
2 – Nice guys come on too strong and share “How they Feel” too early!
Guess what? Attractive women are getting approached by men all the time!
When beautiful women go about their day, when they take their commute to work, go shopping, meet and hang out with their friends, etc., they easily get approached by 10 or 20 different random guys per day! That’s THOUSANDS of men per year.
It gets tedious, repetitive, and predictable.
Nowadays it’s even more pronounced because many women are on dating sites and dating apps, like Tinder. There, they get messages from HUNDREDS of random guys per day who desperately want to fuck them. They get showered with compliments, affection, and validation all day, and constantly bombarded by messages from men who express their love.
As a result, most women end up developing certain filters to weed out boring, predictable, and uninteresting men.
Knowing this, you must understand that there’s no faster way to get an attractive woman to run away from you than by telling her stuff like “I really LOVE you!” or “You’re the best girl in the world!” on your first date, second, or even third date.
SAVE THAT SHIT FOR LATER!
Another explanation of why women like bad boys is that they don’t gush about their feelings right off the bat!
First of all, once women know they can have you right at the beginning and that you’ll do everything for them – the magic is gone. There can be no more spark and they’ll lose respect and attraction towards you. That’s one instance where you have to hold back on “sharing your emotions”.
As much as people hate to admit it, there has to be a certain “game”, or “dating ritual” in the beginning, for natural attraction and seduction to happen.
Other than that, most women who are secure and have their shit together will think: “Why would he fall in love with me so early and easily, when he doesn’t even know me all that well as a person? He must be desperate, or just wants to fuck me for my looks!“. And POOF – she instantly loses all attraction and respect for you.
Believe it or not, if you confess to women how much you love them right when you meet them, they’ll just look at you as if you’re crazy, and leave.
Two reasons for this:
First – They’re right, why would you LOVE someone who you don’t even know on a very deep and personal level? Seriously, you know next to NOTHING about her and you just like the way she looks. But what if she’s a horrible person underneath those looks? What if she’s just a vile, angry, jealous, whiny, dumb human being? What if she’s some psycho mental patient who’s destructive and will ruin both your lives? That’s a bit of an extreme example, but it gets the point across.
People understand that it’s impossible to love someone without even knowing who they are as a person first. Maybe they won’t even be sexually, intellectually, or even emotionally compatible with you? Compatibility is one of the most important components in a healthy and strong relationship.
Second – If you “confess your feelings” right away, women will realize that they have you in their pocket and that you’ll do anything for them. They’ll lose all interest in you because you’ve given all your power away in an instant!
This has to do with the whole Masculine vs Feminine dynamic thing.
And women adore masculine men.
3 – Nice fellows do everything to please women and seek their approval.
A lot of guys always try to please women and mistakenly think that this will make them like us.
Are you guilty of doing that, too?
Here’s the truth – women will NEVER be attracted to someone who tries to kiss up to them.
If all you do is kiss ass, look for their approval, seek permission for everything you do, without seemingly having a will of your own – women will never be attracted to you because they won’t respect you. Trust me, an attention-seeking behavior around women is really, really bad.
In fact, women will get ANNOYED by you!
Don’t believe me? Just ask any beautiful women if she feels annoyed by pussy guys who always chase her around, kiss ass, and do everything in their power to please, hoping to get some of her affection…
This may sound counter-intuitive to you, but it’s exactly why a lot of nice guys fail with women and why girls like bad boys.
You should not be filtering your true thoughts and beliefs in an attempt to impress a woman or tell her what you think she wants to hear.
Why do women love bad boys and want to fuck them? Because they don’t kiss ass all the time!
4 – Niceguys try to CONVINCE women to like them!
First of all – you can’t ever convince a woman to become attracted to you with logic and reasoning. That’s not how attraction works!
Attraction is based on emotions – it’s not a choice that women make by consciously calculating all the things about you.
If the latter were true, only rich successful men would have women around them, whereas right now money is never important for starting a relationship, only maintaining it.
And that’s another reason why girls like bad boys – because they never try to use logic to build attraction, only pure emotions.
I’m sure that there were times when you’ve met a girl that you REALLY like, but when she wasn’t all that much interested in you — you tried to convince her to change her mind!
That never works! Yet a lot of guys go chasing, begging, pleading, crying and asking the girl to change her mind and go out with them. All they hear is “I’m busy” or “I just don’t see you in that way, let’s stay friends”, or a myriad of other usual excuses. “Sorry, I got to wash my cat’s hair today…”
So why do women like bad boys in this case? They don’t chase and don’t try to use logic to convince girls to date them.
5 – “Nice” guys never actually let the girl know that they find her attractive and want her sexually.
This is a big one, and I’ve mentioned it briefly above! It’s also one of the most common reasons why most nice guys get friend zoned!
They are simply too afraid to let the girl know that they want her sexually.
Seriously, how are you going to have sex with someone if you don’t even let them know you like them sexually?! LET THAT SINK IN!
Do they want silent ninja sex or something, where they go in – whoosh whoosh whoosh – finish up, and fly away without her somehow finding out what just happened?
Do you realize how SILLY and ABSURD that sounds?
Here are the basics of human interaction: If you like the person and want to have sex with them, you let that person know you want to have sex with them in no uncertain terms and then, if they feel the same way about you, you start having fun.
But “Really nice”, sexually non-threatening guys usually do something else: They LIKE the girl; they want to go on a date with her, have a lot of fun, sleep with her and eventually start a relationship together . . . Yet they are terrified of getting rejected so they always skirt around the issue of letting the girl know that they want her sexually. Some are even afraid of the girl knowing about their sexuality, or, what’s even worse, are ashamed of it!
They never clearly state their intentions and leave everything ambiguous! They don’t know when and how to initiate – when to kiss her when to touch her and hug her. Because of that, they end up missing the chance and screwing up. They always look for “the perfect moment” to make a move – yet never seem to find it.
I suggest you read my book to find out when and how you should be making your move.
Because once a girl notices that these nice guys always doubt themselves and hesitate when it comes to making a move and expressing their true intentions, or that they’re “too shy” to let her know they want her sexually – she’ll label them as a pussy and lose all respect and attraction! She’ll instantly know she does not want you to be her lover.
So a lot of “nice” guys end up surprised and cry something like “Oh, she rejected my advances!” when the they didn’t even let the girl know they want to fuck her.
Which makes a lot of “nice guys” inherently dishonest. Seriously, it’s in our nature to be physically attracted to beautiful women and to want to have sex with them. Not hiding your sexuality is one of the most important reasons why girls love bad boys!
They know it, we know it – so grow up, don’t be afraid to ADMIT IT, accept it, and NEVER hide it!
Again, this is about femininity and masculinity. Sexual tension. Those kinds of important things.
Once again, why are women addicted to the company of bad boys? Because they’re comfortable with their sexuality and don’t hide it!
6 – Nice guys give her gifts, hoping to get her affection in return.
Many “nice guys” think that if they bring flowers on a date, buy her drinks, give her expensive gifts and do other similar stuff when they don’t even know her – before she actually deserves all these things – that she’ll somehow start showing affection right away.
Guys, these are not the 1950’s anymore! This is the same as men being shallow and only appreciating women by looks and trying to buy their affection.
Think of it from a woman’s perspective: She doesn’t know you all that much and you don’t know her. When you meet her on the first date – you give her an expensive gift, flowers, or something similar. She thinks “Why would he do that? He doesn’t even know me? He must want or expect something in return! He must do this to all women!”
Once she starts thinking that – it’s all over. Everything you do from then on will go through that filter of “you want something from her in return, and must compensate for your character flaws with gifts or money”. It’s showing her that you have low self-esteem, like you think you’re somehow not “worthy” by yourself and must add incentive so that she likes you. Seriously, let THAT sink in.
It has the same effect as putting women on pedestals, treating them like princesses, never disagreeing, arguing, having your own ideas, and basically being a total doormat. Very unattractive!
Yet again I’ll ask you why do women like bad boys and can’t get enough of them? Well, girls love and adore such men because they don’t have to compensate for their personality or lack of it, with gifts!
7 – “Good guys” do everything to make sure that things are as perfect as they can be.
A lot of guys never argue, offend, tease, or disagree with the girl in any way.
They are basically afraid of losing her. This shows her that they have many problems with their self-esteem. And also, this shows a ton of desperation.
If you are desperate, no girl is going to like you. That’s because desperation emanates from you like a cheap perfume and girls smell it on you easily!
Desperation is probably the number one attraction-killer in the world. As soon as a girl gets even a whiff of the fact that you’re DESPERATE to sleep with her, her legs will lock shut and you’ll never have a chance with her. It instantly kills any shred of her respect for you.
If you’re too afraid of teasing the girl, “ruffling her feathers” so to speak, which is a form of flirting – you’ll never create any strong emotions and strong sexual attraction.
Being disrespectful to a woman is the clearest way of communicating that you are indifferent to her opinion of you. Women will find it very difficult to rationalize why a man who’s interested in them would be insulting them. An insult can sub-communicate to a woman that you are not trying to impress her or are emotionally dependent on her validation. Thus, the women you interact with will not sense that you have an agenda and will be more likely to trust what you say as being honest.
HOWEVER, you should never actively start insulting women just to get a reaction from them – because that’s inherently wrong and manipulative!
Insults are NOT why women like bad boys. A badboy does not insult a woman on purpose, he does it unintentionally and offhandedly! Pickup artists have twisted this into negs and use it as a very potent yet highly manipulative technique. Instead of using such silly shit on purpose, learn how to be naturally more challenging when around women, and learn HOW TO PLAYFULLY TEASE!
Now, I’m sure you’ve made at least a couple of these deadly mistakes.
You may think that these things are getting you closer to her, when in fact, they make her lose any attraction and respect towards you right away, effectively killing your chances with her.
And that’s just the tip of the iceberg. There are plenty of other things that nice guys do wrong and then wonder why women like bad boys and not them.
So if you don’t know what’s going on and constantly shout “Why girl like bad boy and not me!?”, then take a good look at yourself and see if you’re exhibiting any of the things I just mentioned. You’ll more likely than not be shocked to find out that, in fact, you do make at least one or two of these sins!
Final thoughts on why women are attracted to bad boys
I hope you now see that women love bad boys for a very good reason. Not because they’re bad people, but because they are authentic, genuine, don’t try to impress, have solid standards and boundaries, don’t give a shit about what others think, and as a result create a ton of emotions in people who they interact with.
If you want to learn more about what attractive character traits these rebels and baddies possess, I suggest you read what makes a man attractive to a woman.
Finally, I’m not saying that you should abuse women or treat them like shit. I am merely informing what women respond to and why girls like bad boys and want to sleep with them!
In the end, for a stable and healthy relationship, all of this has to be combined with compassion, kindness, dependability, honesty, trustworthiness, vulnerability, authenticity and caring – as well as COMPATIBILITY.
So I hope I shone some much-needed light on the subject of why most women like bad boys and want them in their lives! Don’t hate.
If you have any thoughts on the subject of bad boy vs nice guy – you’re more than welcome to share them down in the comment section below, where we can start a discussion.
To learn how to quickly develop the most attractive qualities that these bad boys embody, join my newsletter to get a Full Free Inner Game Course! I’m sure you’ve already seen the signup popup – don’t miss your chance while it’s free because I’ll later make this course cost lots of money once I’m done fully developing it.
TL;DR VERSION of why do women like bad boys if you just read the conclusion:
There’s a thing called masculinity and femininity.
Feminine women are massively drawn to masculine men, and masculine men display certain incredibly attractive character traits like confidence, DOMINANCE, indifference, directness and decisiveness, self-reliance, among many other things – and they generally don’t doubt themselves all that much.
This sparks massive attraction and incredibly addicting strong emotions in women who meet and get to experience such a guy.
To contrast this, “Nice guys” are boring, aim to please, and generally don’t display these attractive character traits because they are constantly wracked with self-doubt, which is one of the most unattractive things you can display. As a result, they don’t elicit strong emotional responses in girls and constantly keep asking in frustration why women like bad boys and not them.
And because of that, the “jerks” and “assholes” get to have all the fun, while the nice men go home and jerk off alone.
But don’t worry, there’s a very good and fast way to fix all of this, so that you’ll never have to wonder why girls like bad boys, and not you – because you’ll be able to get as much sex as you want.
Just go to Saulis Dating and read what it says there, in full. If you follow the process and do the exercises – it will transform you into someone who incorporates the best traits of both bad boys and nice guys, and remove the negative ones – becoming a true man of value – a sexworthy man who women WANT to sleep with and start various relationships with because of how you make them feel!