Why do women like bad boys vs nice guys? 2023 Update

If you’re often wondering “Why do women like bad boys and prefer them to nice guys?” then I’ll help you out.

This is a very in-depth guide about what makes bad boys so incredibly attractive to women. And how YOU can take some of the best characteristics of these men and use them to become much more successful with girls.

I’ll also answer the question of “What is a bad boy?” and explain everything about why women love bad boys in as much detail as possible.

Plus, I’ll list many core reasons why most girls will not respect nice guys or even give them the time of day, instead choosing to go out with men who aren’t so “nice”.

So, be sure to read the entire post if you truly want to know the underlying reason behind this phenomenon and understand just why “bad boys vs nice guys” is such a complex topic.

Yes, I’m aware this article on bad boy meaning is very lengthy. But it can very well change your whole life if you read and understand everything here. And then take the necessary steps to apply the knowledge to your life, personally.

In fact, I promise you that if you read it all and prevent yourself from making the mistakes I’m going to mention below, you’ll get laid much more often than you do now!

That’s because you’ll have enough knowledge to develop the bad boy attitude and lifestyle which helps a LOT with attraction and respect from women. And you’ll learn how to avoid all the biggest nice guy mistakes.

But here’s the really condensed version of the whole bad boy vs nice guy thing:

The essence of badboys is — DO WHATEVER THE FUCK YOU WANT


So Why Do Women Like Bad Boys, Exactly?

Before you find out, you should know that most people’s whole concept of “bad boys” is usually WRONG.

A very common misconception is thinking that bad boys get all the girls because they’re “bad” or treat women like shit. That’s entirely not true! They get women because they push for it and sexually escalate mercilessly and unabashedly. They have the audacity to try and try again, and they often succeed.

They are also unapologetic about their sexuality.

The main misconception that “bad boys” are bad people is deluded and a complete myth.

That’s because the vast majority of girls do not like bad men or bad people in general. Which means the whole label is bullshit, to begin with…

“Bad boys” don’t treat women badly because they want to. They simply do whatever the hell they want.

They follow their own path in life. And sometimes people around them get unintentionally hurt as a result, mostly as a side effect. It’s one of the core reasons why women like bad boys, but not the main one.

If there was actually a guy who’d treat women badly because he WANTED to, intentionally, then he wouldn’t be a “bad boy”. He’d simply be a malicious person in general, and a prick that most women would not want anything to do with. So, don’t treat women badly just for the sake of it or because you’ve heard somewhere that “women like assholes.” Because it will quickly backfire and women will shun you.

So what is a bad boy then?

Someone who doesn’t conform to approved standards of behavior, who doesn’t give a damn about what others think of him and does what he wants. And someone who affects women on a raw and emotional level because of the vibe they give out.

Here’s what really makes bad boys so attractive!

The REAL and the most fundamental reason why women like bad boys is very simple: They elicit a STRONG EMOTIONAL RESPONSE from women with their actions and words.

And that’s it.

That’s the entire mind-blowing secret as to why most women will find this type of man extremely and utterly attractive and why girls like bad boys in general.

It’s the reason why they’ll sleep with such a man at the drop of a dime and then fall in love with him.

It’s the reason why they’ll have threesomes and foursomes and whatever else you can think of with a guy like that.

Basically, women will have sex with such a man all the time, whenever he wants to. Because of the way he makes them FEEL.

But that’s just the core thing. There are many other reasons why women enjoy the company of rogue-type personalities.

I’ll explain them all below but they all come back to that one fundamental principle – ELICITING STRONG EMOTIONS in others.

Why? Because when a woman is attracted to a man – and I mean TRULY attracted and turned on – she often doesn’t know why and feels uncomfortable because of it.

Science says that the physiological signs of attraction and agitation are indistinguishable. 

That’s because when you cause various strong emotions in people, you effectively agitate them. Whether they then feel fear, anxiety or attraction and excitement due to the agitation you stirred up by the emotions you made them feel, depends entirely on the context and the situation.

When a woman becomes attracted to you on a gut instinct level, her heart starts racing. Her pupils widen, her muscles tense up, she gets that pit-of-the-stomach feeling and also becomes a little lightheaded.

Do you know what else causes that? You guessed it; many other negative states, like fear, anxiety, worry.

She’ll feel uncomfortable and will naturally seek to alleviate her discomfort by shit-testing you and seeing if you’ll crumble under the pressure. To see if you’re truly who you say or show you are. As a subconscious self-defence mechanism of sorts.

If you pass all her shit-tests, she’ll confirm you are genuine and authentic. And her attraction towards you will rise.

The sexual tension between you will also increase, causing her a bit more of that good type of anxiety. And she’ll relieve that anxiety and agitation by having sex with you. Because it will effectively give her the validation she’ll crave from you.

Incidentally, if you have no idea what shit-tests are and why they’re massively important to get laid with women. Then be sure to read how to pass any and all shit tests that women throw at you!

Now that we understand what happens when women become attracted and why ELICITING STRONG EMOTIONS in women is key to seducing them, we can talk about why women like bad boys so much. 

The Push/Pull lifestyle is perfect for sparking emotions

This anxiety is exactly the reason why things like the Push/Pull dynamic works wonders when it comes to attracting beautiful women.

“Pushing” women away goes right to the center of their self-image, agitates them, and makes them feel various strong emotions. When you are pushing her away, you are instilling that good anxiety that women need to feel to become aroused.

However, you shouldn’t think of Push/Pull as a PUA technique or a tactic that you should use indiscriminately and with little foresight.

Instead, if you want to consistently attract women, proper Push/Pull should be a lifestyle. In fact, this and being challenging, in general, are an essential part of the bad boy lifestyle.

During my interactions, I’ve learned to be naturally challenging to women.

I do around 80-90% of pushing during my conversations, which gets me beyond excellent results.

Why? Because I am making the girl I’m meeting uncomfortable and agitated. Not in a creepy way, but an assertive, masculine, and playful way. That shows I’m not desperate or needy and that I’m amusing myself. Eliciting very strong emotions in her as a result.

And guess what? She needs to get out of that state by getting fucked by me later. To dissipate all the pent up sexual tension between us and to get my validation.

Incidentally, this is why I love playfully teasing girls when I’m with them. And why I think it’s one of the most important skills and bad boy techniques to master in seduction.

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It helps you develop a bad boy attitude which women respond powerfully to.

But I’m getting ahead of myself. Here are more reasons why maverick-type guys are insanely attractive:

Why do “Nice Guys” Fail With Women So Often?

First of all, let me preface this section by saying that there are genuinely legit nice guys who are simply nice, kindhearted and warm people.

They usually lack success with women because they are introverted and not very confident when talking to women.

All they need to do is learn how to trust themselves more, raise their self-esteem and get some experience socializing with women under the belt.

With that said, there are self-proclaimed “Nice Guys” out there, who are definitely anything but nice. This is the true bad boy vs nice guy conflict I’m talking about and you can read more about them on Reddit /r/niceguys.

So why do these “Nice Guys” fail so badly with girls?

Mostly because they are dishonest and don’t actually respect women at all!

In fact, they harbor a deep grudge and hatred for girls because they think they’re somehow owed sex for being decent and nice.


A lot of guys are outright RUDE to women when they get rejected and show they can’t take rejection like a secure man with high self-esteem would.

They think being rude is part of how to have a bad boy attitude when talking to women, but they’re dead wrong.


Quite a few guys even expect women to want to fuck them just because they are being nice to them.

They can’t distinguish simple friendliness from sexual interest. There are a lot of things wrong with this mentality.

I have tons of these examples. But that’s not the only reason why nice guys fail to interest women so often.

A nice guy’s actions can often be interpreted by women as an attempt to buy their affection.

He thinks he must “do certain things” or “prove his worth” for women to like him.

He internally believes that girls are not going to like him simply for who he is, so he has to compensate for that with external things. Also, such a guy often hides the fact that he likes women sexually. Due to deep-rooted guilt or shame, usually due to religion, overly-strict parents, no social skills, etc.

As a result, the actions of such a man are very often incredibly dishonest.

“Nice Guys” are dishonest with women

A guy like that pretends that he’s not interested in attractive women when talking to them, even though he is. And then he’s surprised when women become really confused by his actions and intentions.

He’s very often afraid that women will figure out his “secret” – that he wants them sexually. And that he’d want to fuck their brains out, right then and there.

But how are women supposed to know what he wants from them? They can’t read minds.

If a guy acts nice and expects sex in return because of that – he’s delusional. That’s how you make friends, not lovers!

In effect, he is NOT being his authentic self – he is being dishonest and he hides himself and his true intentions from women.

Essentially, what that says about a man is that he’s afraid to live life. Afraid that other people will judge him for his natural wants and needs.

He puts too much weight on other people’s opinions about himself.

This shows that he does not have his shit together, is not secure in himself, and has severe self-esteem issues. No wonder then that he keeps wondering why girls like bad boys and not him!

Also, nice guys often say that women are shallow. When in fact it’s the guy himself who’s incredibly superficial:

Here’s another example:

superficial and shallow nice guy

It’s funny how “nice guys” complain that women don’t give them the time of day if they look bad.

They don’t spend the necessary time to go exercise and develop their bodies but expect hotties to date them. When in turn, they would NEVER give a fat or ugly woman their time of day as well.

Hypocrisy at its best.

All in all, most “Nice Guys” are effectively lying to the woman they talk to.

Incongruent behavior lowers attraction and trust

There is incongruence between their thoughts, words, and actions. This incongruence shows the girl that although he likes her, he lacks self-confidence and assertiveness,. He craves her validation and wants an intact ego more than he wants the actual girl.

And that’s not the worst part.

A lot of guys put women on pedestals, thinking they’re these perfect beings who need worship, kissing up to, pleasing all the time, etc.

That is effectively OBJECTIFYING women and not considering them as human beings and as equals. Which is incredibly sad and makes women lose all respect for the guys who do this.

That’s what so refreshing about badboy type personalities. And one of the most important reasons why women enjoy their company so much.

These men fully realize that women are just like you and me. That they’re NORMAL REGULAR PEOPLE who eat, shit, breathe, sleep, fart, burp, and fuck to survive.

As a result, “bad boys” never put women on pedestals and instead talk to them like they talk to everyone else, without preferential treatment. That’s why women love them and adore them and want to have sex with them.

But “nice guys” see this sort of behavior from “bad men”, go apeshit and yell to themselves “HOW DARE THEY DISRESPECT MY PRINCESS?!” and falsely label these individualists as assholes and jerks.

So, if you do this, I have some bad news for you. You are not really a nice guy…

Sorry, someone had to tell you this.

But don’t worry if you happen to be like the person I described above. Because I’m here to help you change.

Although you really have to take some time to look at yourself in the mirror, reflect on your personality and your mindsets, and WANT to change. For things to get better.

Now let’s talk about something else that’s important.

Core Bad Boy Qualities: Honesty and Authenticity

Bad boys are HONEST and AUTHENTIC in their actions and purpose. They don’t hide their intentions when it comes to women. They have no problems letting the girl know that they want her sexually. And they don’t say stuff just to impress the girl because they simply don’t care and are not afraid of losing her!

Bad boys also tend to effortlessly and unconsciously exude certain attractive character traits. Like dominance, confidence, indifference, directness and decisiveness, masculinity, and so on.

I’ll explain all of this, including other bad boy qualities, in detail below.

But now let’s look at the “Nice guy” again, which is another bullshit label. But let’s just roll with it for a second.

Have you noticed that the really attractive women never seem to be attracted to nice guys?

Just like me in the past, I’m sure you’ve had attractive female friends that always seemed to date various “jerks”, “assholes”, and “bad boys.” But for some reason, they were never romantically interested in you.

So why is that?

The answer is simple: As a contrast to adventurous men that badboys tend to be, nice guys are boring. And I do mean excruciatingly, thoroughly BORING!!

They also give all of their power away when talking to girls and try to impress all the time. Then they keep asking in exasperation why beautiful women with options don’t go for them. Even though it’s all pretty obvious.

So how do you avoid the Nice Guy Trap and attract women like bad boys do?

Pretty simple: You must stop filtering your true thoughts and beliefs in an attempt to impress women or tell them what you think they want to hear.

You must also develop rock-solid standards and boundaries, among other things.

When women sense and realize you’re constantly stuck in your head filtering your words, they lose the feeling they can fully trust what you say. They then realize that your emotions are dependent on their validation – and that’s never attractive!

Men should be in control of their emotions. They shouldn’t act like girls (read: pussies!) because women don’t want another pussy near them since they’ve already got one (unless they’re gay obviously). Instead, women want a man who is secure in himself and is stable emotionally. Dependable and reliable, honest and authentic.

On the other hand, when women sense that your emotions do not depend on their validation, approval, or similar things. An enormous amount of pressure is instantly lifted from your interactions. You’ll both be free to enjoy each other’s company.

Through removing one’s filters and ceasing to seek approval and not acting needy, you will gain the trust and respect of most women. In general, women will more often than not be intrigued by your authenticity and honesty. Rather than get upset that you don’t share the same exact views and opinions as they do.

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So why do women like bad boys in this instance? Exactly because of the fact they don’t filter their words and thoughts. That’s what bad boys excel at. And that lack of filter naturally creates tons of emotions with anyone who they interact with!

Ladies like a guy who’s an “asshole” simply because he communicates honest signals without a filter. Not trying to seek someone’s approval and validation.

And not because he actively insults women.

A guy like that doesn’t try to impress. He just does whatever he wants to do and doesn’t weigh himself down with thoughts of “What if?”

He is simply being true to himself, his own path in life and to his nature – a genuine, honest, and authentic man.

That’s why there’s so little self-doubt with these type of radical men.

Women can trust that he won’t be putting on some type of act in front of them to “get them.” Women can trust that the man in front of them who they’re getting to know is actually who he says he is.

Nice guys are predictable

Nice guys are also very predictable – and where’s the fun in that?

Where’s the fun for a woman in going on a date with a guy and knowing exactly how he’s going to treat her. Already knowing what he’s going to do and what he’s going to say?

The nice guy is going to be like the other 50 guys that a desirable girl talked with and promptly forgot. Because she didn’t get moved or engaged by them emotionally at all. She felt no emotions.

And here’s one more thing to consider: Most “Nice Guys” are irrationally nice to women. Meaning they invest too much in the girl early on and show more affection and much more attention than the girl rationally deserves from them.

The Greek philosopher Plato said that emotional love is a kind of madness. When things are going well – you’re irrationally nice to the person out of proportion to what they deserve. When things are going badly, you’re irrationally nasty to the person out of proportion to what they deserve.

Women know that when you are irrationally nice to them – you will eventually be irrationally shitty to them. They don’t want that, at all.

So here’s the real deal:

Women don’t base their choice of men on how nice they are. They choose the men they do because they feel a gut level attraction to them. And the only thing that truly attracts women are your abilities to make them feel various emotions. Any and all emotions – yes, even a few and occasional bad ones!

The easiest and best way to get into any woman’s pants, and in fact into their minds so they will totally adore you. Is by taking them on an Emotional Ride. Because emotions are addicting!

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Now, prepare for a rant about nice guys vs bad boys!

This bullshit boils my blood whenever I see it since it’s the reason why most men are utterly incompetent and unsuccessful with women.

Why are women so enamored with bad boys?

Well, why do you think most “nice guys” whine about being “oh so nice” to women, about treating them well, doing everything in their power for their date to be “as perfect as can be” and constantly being afraid to fuck up?

After that, they’re then baffled when those same women don’t like them and don’t give them the time of day. And instead choose a “bad guy” who may treat them badly, cheat on them and so on.

Do you realize what an absolute emotional roller-coaster a “bad boy” can shove a girl through? 

That emotional roller coaster is worth the occasional negative emotion they feel. And in fact, those negative emotions do wonders for attraction. Because they come at unpredictable times, just when she least expects them.

Those negative emotions are completely unintentional because being the rule breakers that they are, these guys just don’t give a damn.

Those emotions are so incredibly addictive that the girls can’t help themselves but swoon over a guy like that. No matter if he sometimes treats them objectively badly. It’s like a Drug, and he’s the Dealer.

He can make a girl Laugh, then turn around and make her Cry, make her Scared, make her Doubtful. But then turn around and make her Happy, make her feel Sexy, Appreciated. Then he can turn around and make her Panic, then turn around again and make her Giddy with Joy, then say something sexual to make her Horny – and so on and so forth. That girl will jump his bones any time he wants to.

He brings emotions in spades, every single time the girl is with him. Such a guy is rarely predictable and never boring. And women respond massively and positively to it because it’s like living in a soap opera or a romantic novel to them! Lots of anticipation and great payoffs.

Emotions are the only freely given drug that women respond to massively. And if you can do this – you’ll be phenomenally successful with women.

Some guys can do this naturally, some guys have to learn this. But if you can spike a girl’s emotions and can provide this drug – you’re gonna be golden with the vast majority of girls and get laid as much as you want.

I know I do. And that’s why I never have to ask “Why do girls like bad boys so much?” Because I already know that it’s all about how you make women FEEL. And not what you own, how you look, or anything else about you.

If you understand this and exude this vibe, you’ll notice many signs a girl likes you when you go on dates.

What’s Wrong With “Nice Guys” and Why Are They So Unattractive to Women?

Here are some other reasons why women like bad boys and don’t respect “white knights,” otherwise known as Nice Guys:

Like I said before, a typical Nice Guy is utterly predictable.

He’s going to only treat women one way, which is boring.

He’s only going to say things that won’t offend or hurt them.

What’s more, he’s also never going to ruffle their feathers, even if as a joke. Because he thinks that they’re going to leave him for it or become unhappy.

A guy like that is afraid of losing girls because of his actions or words. He’s desperate to keep her and will be walking on eggshells the entire time!

For the love of all that’s good – Don’t be afraid to have a woman be mad at you!

So many men are wrongly terrified of the consequences of having a woman be mad at them.

That’s so sad, and incredibly ironic. Because there are no consequences of having a woman be a little mad at you if you don’t give her what she wants. And if you do it right, there are only benefits!

So, don’t hold back when you want to tell her she is doing stupid shit!! Then man the fuck up and stand your ground when she inevitably shit-tests you, by learning how to deal with them. However, this all requires you to create solid and healthy boundaries, and then to enforce them. 

To learn how to do that, sign up for my Newsletter to get the Inner Game Course for free. The first lesson is about BOUNDARIES.

So, a nice guy is afraid of stirring emotions in a woman. A nice guy is unsure of himself, he is not confident in himself, and always in self-doubt.

And self-doubt is among the WORST qualities any person can possess. This perpetual self-doubt will destroy any man’s chances with women!

How can a date with such a guy ever be exciting? How can he strongly attract a girl if he just sits there and reports about his day and asks her all the questions the other 50 guys before him have asked her?

How can a nice guy get anywhere with a desirable woman, one who has many potential suitors? If he’s just like the grey masses who are afraid to speak their mind for fear of being judged? And who can’t stand up for themselves and reveal their personalities?

Fear of revealing yourself and your personality KILLS respect

That’s another key issue – “nice guys” are afraid to reveal their personalities. But you have to understand that without showing your personality, you will NEVER attract a mature, stable and secure girl.

Women with strong personalities also want a man with a strong personality. It’s as simple as that!

Because what’s there to like about a guy who’s afraid of other people seeing him for who he is?

If he’s afraid to speak up because he thinks people will think badly of him and that people will judge his every thought. Then he’s got massive self-esteem issues and insecurities.

In effect, he’s afraid to live life! And no self-respecting woman in her right mind will ever respect such a boy!

I say boy, because he is NOT a man. He needs to mature, invest in himself and develop himself until he becomes one!

People are ALWAYS going to judge others, no matter what you say or do. It’s just a fact of life.

Some people judge subconsciously, but they still make judgments about others. Because it’s a natural survival mechanism that lets people quickly see if someone they’re talking to is not a maniac, weirdo or some creep. It’s seeing if someone is worth talking to or if you should run away from them.

And nice guys don’t realize this; they always try to “play it safe”. And safe can be many things, even good ones – but safe is NEVER SEXY! There’s no attraction.

And this is the inherent problem – most nice guys elicit no emotions because they want to stay safe. They’re afraid of getting out of their comfort zones.

Or if they do elicit emotions, those are very few and of a single spectrum.

Yes, I’ll repeat this point about not being able to elicit emotions again and again. Because too many guys are utter morons when it comes to women, for failure to realize this point.

However, it’s usually not their fault – and it’s not YOUR fault if you’re guilty of doing this.

The truth is that many men who fail with women simply haven’t been educated in sexual dynamics. About how attraction and seduction works. And that’s why they end up asking everyone “Why do women like bad boys so much and not me?”

Not one’s taught them these things. Not their friends, not their teachers, and certainly not their parents. Because for some reason the subject is often “Taboo!”

Instead, most guys are being conditioned to deceive themselves about how intimate relationships should function. And to generally hide their own feelings of dissatisfaction from themselves. By various movies, shows, books and songs where “Nice guy always gets the girl.”

And when they actually do stupid shit like this and fail in the real world, time after time. They become bitter. And identify with being hopeless and loveless. Which is where the harmful incel movement comes from.

This could all be turned around if only more guys start developing a healthy self esteem. And realize how important emotions are when it comes to the art of attraction and seduction.

Why Are Emotions So Important in Seduction?

Emotions are what drive people. Emotions are the currency of attraction, seduction, sex, and satisfaction. People do things for one reason and one reason only – to change the way they feel.

People are literally driven to action by emotions. We all want to experience them. We ALL crave emotional fulfillment. (That’s why we watch so many movies and series, and play computer or other games, by the way.)

And that’s exactly why women prefer bad boys!

Why do you think people like dramas so much? Even stupid and illogical daytime dramas that are watched by millions of housewives around the world.

Those women are hoping and pleading internally that some guy will come along and make them feel something. Anything, even if that something is a bad emotion. After watching these shows and reading tons of romance novels, women CRAVE that a bad boy comes along and sweeps them off their feet. And takes them on an adventure.

Because they want adventure in life, not boredom – and bad boys can provide that in spades!

Women crave emotions but usually don’t get as much of them as they want. Their boring husband comes home and the whole deathly-boring routing starts all over again. “Hi honey, yes honey, you’re right honey, I’ll take the kids honey, anything you want honey, is there anything to eat honey?” Then he dispassionately kisses his wife, watches TV or spends hours on his PC and goes to sleep, only to repeat the same boring routine all over again tomorrow!

Where are the emotions in that?!

Here’s how to have a real bad boy attitude

While this kind of routine-filled life is nice, safe, and stable, it will not make your wife have the hots for you! It will not stir her emotionally and especially SEXUALLY.

But then a bad boy comes along, says to her “Fuck this, let’s do that instead, what the fuck are you doing? Go suck my dick instead!” and guess what happens next? That same boring husband comes home to find them banging in his bed…

But the bad boy doesn’t say these things intentionally. It’s just what he naturally does because he’s unafraid and doesn’t care.

He also doesn’t judge that women are sleeping with him right away. He doesn’t judge their personality, fetishes, wet dreams and kinkiness. Instead, he EMBRACES all of that – and the results speak for themselves. It’s part of his bad boy attitude and he embraces this freedom fully.

Being non-judgemental is another important reason why women like bad boys and why they’re so attractive. Such a man does his own thing, doesn’t give a fuck about what others think, has concrete boundaries that he will fight tooth and nail for. And that drives people crazy.

It drives women crazy by agitating them emotionally; and that’s why they want to sleep with such a man.

And guess what? Do you think nice guys don’t judge a woman’s sexuality?

They do, and that’s where slut-shaming comes from.

And that’s exactly why women hide their sexual side from their boring “friends.” Because they’ll get judged to shit for it. Which is why it’s so important to learn how to have a bad boy attitude without all its negative parts.

But that’s another topic for another time.

Join my newsletter to find out how changing your mindset and being non-judgmental about sex will bring you more casual sex than you can ever handle! It’s another crucial reason behind why girls like bad boys and enjoy their company so much.

Here’s more relevant content to help develop a bad boy attitude without the negative traits:

How to Turn a Woman On and Make Her Wet

How often should I text her? Should you text a girl everyday?

How to ask a girl on a date

How to Make Her Chase You – a Girl or Woman

How to Get Laid at a Party and Why Most Guys Don’t

Signs a girl likes you and that she wants you to make a move on her!

So what is a bad boy, exactly? Is he a scoundrel?

Let’s see a standard representation of a typical bad boy meaning:

Pretty accurate, right? When people think of “typical bad boys” they may picture something like this.

So why do you think girls like bad boys who have this kind of look?

Well, do you know why a girl will swoon over a guy like that? Do you know why she’s going to get wet and horny just at the thought of him?

Don’t get me wrong, women won’t think that he’s going to make a good boyfriend, husband or partner for them. In fact, they don’t know or even think that he’s a great guy or even a good person in general. They may even consider him to be a somewhat bad person! But they don’t care – because they know that dating and being with such a guy is not going to be boring! Which is the true bad boy meaning!

Women will knowingly go into a relationship with such a guy, even if just as a fuckbuddies relationship. Because they know they’re going to have a fun and emotional time with such a guy. Also, because he isn’t going to be judgmental when it comes to sex and she’ll be free to enjoy her sexuality with him. In any event, it’s all going to be an ADVENTURE, even if it’s a scary one at first.

Again, that’s the whole secret behind why women like bad boys. And this has nothing to do with the guy’s looks, too! He may as well be fat and unshaven, but if he gives the vibe of being a “bad boy who can spike my emotions” – a woman’s going to be sold on that.

Don’t believe me? Well, it’s all based on actual SCIENCE.

Research done by Schachter & Singer, showed in their psychological studies that when their subjects became agitated and then approached by an attractive confederate (person who is in on the whole thing and is part of the research, but test subjects don’t know this) – they rated them as more attractive than the control group of unagitated persons did.

Another study done by Dutton & Aron had subjects cross a scary suspension bridge over a 230-foot chasm. The control group crossed a sturdy cedar bridge over a small gurgling stream; in this case fear resulted in higher attraction toward the confederate.

So, take women who may be somewhat attracted to you on a scary or exciting adventure; and they will become MUCH MORE attracted to you!

Take women on dates that include physical activities. Or to places where the environment is exciting, loud, and very fun.

This will create lots of emotions and will agitate them and show them the true meaning of being with a bad boy. Or, if you’re more advanced, you can take women on a simple coffee date, if you know how to elicit those strong emotions YOURSELF! By teasing them, ruffling their feathers, using playful banter, and so on.

Why Bad Boys Elicit Strong Emotional Responses in Women

This is the biggest truth I’ve realized in 10 years of learning attraction, seduction and being successful with women.

Emotions are the currency, and whoever can bring them will be knee deep in pussy.

It’s also part of the core bad boy attitude that women can’t get enough of.

I can rant about this all day, I can write a whole book about the particular topic of why women like bad boys. But I’m not sure that it will do any good since people tend to return to their comfort zones if someone doesn’t give them a swift kick in the rear.

I have another book, about how to consistently get laid on the first date, which shows how you can take all of the attractive qualities of “bad boys” for yourself and focuses on self-improvement and learning how to be authentic, genuine and naturally attractive to women. While also taking the best bits of bad boy personality into play to create tons of emotions on your dates.

Even merely writing about this shit makes ME emotional. And that’s the exact reason why I like this subject so much and why I do this. So it’s not only women who are addicted to emotions – everyone is.

The most powerful people in the world are those who can easily manipulate the emotions of others and use them to their advantage.

These people can make you do ANYTHING. Take Trump as an example and notice how he used emotions to get elected. So, why not apply this knowledge to be successful with women?

That is exactly what “bad boys” do, naturally. And that’s why girls like them so much!

But ultimately, these adventurous men are just a fantasy. A fantasy of an adventurous life with an adventurous person. That’s not inherently right or wrong because who wouldn’t want to live an adventurous life?

And you know what? Nice guys can become adventurous, too. It’s all about learning how and about self-improvement in general. Living life the way you like, unafraid of judgement.

You can learn how to develop a bad boy personality and characteristics by studying my material. Without all the negative connotations normally associated with these individuals and without turning into a jerk who is intentionally hurtful to people.

I was utterly incompetent around women once. I was a virgin for a long time and now I’ve had more sex than most men on the planet can ever hope to get. With the most beautiful girls from all over the world.

How did I do that? By incorporating all the positive bad boy personality traits into myself, while leaving out all the abusive and negative bullshit. I took out the most important reasons why girls like bad boys so much and have made them a part of me.

And I can show you how to do that so you can achieve the bad boy lifestyle in a very easy and quick way.

How to stop being an emotional mute – THIS IS ESSENTIAL

A huge part of the problem is that many people have low self-esteem and a ton of insecurities. Particularly, too many guys pay too much attention to what other people think of them.

And that’s the crux of the issue, really.

If you care too much what other people think of you – you’ve already lost. Because your actions will always be affected by others and not you alone.

If you care too much about what others think of you, you will not be able to express yourself and your personality freely to people who you interact with!

You need to learn how to simply not give a fuck! 

But that’s not an easy thing to achieve if you don’t know how to develop this mindset. For that, I suggest that you sign up for my INNER GAME course!

In any case, you’re living on a planet with over 7.5 Billion people. If you’re afraid to speak your mind and show who you are because you think others will judge you for it, then you need to realize a couple of things about life.

Mostly, that judgment is entirely unavoidable in any society – and that no matter who you are, no matter what you do, and what you have going on in your life – SOME PEOPLE ARE SIMPLY NOT GOING TO LIKE YOU!

Why would you then try to do right and be liked by EVERYONE. If you know that it’s impossible to do and is inherently a FOOL’S ERRAND? Something that’s unachievable and a total waste of your time and energy!

The ability to not give a shit about the opinions of others is another core reason of why do women like bad boys so much. And it’s also an integral part of the true bad boy attitude and lifestyle that men must develop to drive women wild with arousal.

Without the ability to freely and fully express yourself without fear, you will not get far in life.

You’ll live, you may get a decent job, maybe a girlfriend who also has some issues of her own. And is also insecure because she’s interested in YOUR insecure ass. Then you’ll have some kids with her, work work work, grow old, and die without having lived all that much.

If that kind of life is for you, then by all means, you can go and do it. But it just seems so mediocre, that’s all.

Why settle for a girl that you can barely get, who is a mess herself? Instead of manning the fuck up, developing yourself as a person, and then being able to choose the most compatible and beautiful girl that you meet and go on a date with? One who complements your relationship instead of depending on you.

A woman who understands you along with your values. Knows what drives you, gets your ambitions and likes your virtues. To build a better life together with her.

Why then not have confident and virile children with her? Children who are also secure in themselves and grow up to be good people.

Why not choose the job or business that suits you best – and enjoy a fulfilling life, and flourish?

Because if you’re a “nice” guy who’s afraid of other people, you’re by extension afraid of life, that’s why!

But FEAR happens only because you imagine a bad outcome.

You’re not a psychic, you don’t know what’s going to happen when you approach beautiful women.

So focus on thinking positive thoughts, like “Well, she looks great, so I’ll come over, say Hi, and find out who she is!” Then embrace the bad boy meaning and go and do your thing and see what happens.

Yes, sometimes you will fail and she’ll reject you. Because that’s just a simple fact of life and no one can have everything they want. But sometimes you won’t. And I like those odds! Those are better odds than ALWAYS failing because you don’t even approach!

Stop being afraid of life and instead lead the bad boy lifestyle!

It’s time to learn about the bad boy lifestyle.

Right now, I’m guessing you probably can’t go up to that girl you like and speak your mind in a genuine and authentic manner. Because you think you’re unworthy or that she’ll reject you, or a thousand other reasons why it’s a bad idea.

You can’t go to your boss and set things right, you can’t work on your idea and build it into something valuable. But WHY?

This may all sound like a pipe dream to you. Well, it may or may not be, but these things are certainly achievable!

All you have to do to achieve them is demand change from yourself and start NOW. Decide for yourself that you’re going to take control of your own life and not remain passive. Decide for yourself that you’re going to get out of your comfort zone and be proactive!

Then invest in yourself, invest in your personality, develop your character and your bad boy attitude. As well as your attractive character traits, social skills, social confidence (which comes from experience) and go out into the world and get the things you want and deserve!

If you can’t do it alone and if you can’t find the material to change yourself on your own, then SEEK HELP.

Hell, if you want, you can even pay me to coach you and I’ll give it my best to build you from the ground up. And turn you into a successful man who’s unafraid to live and who’s secure in himself.

A man who takes care of himself, likes himself and understands the bad boy meaning at its core, and who women love and adore as a result. But my 1-on-1 coaching is very expensive, so it’s not for everyone. Because I’m sure as hell not going to do it for free – I value my time 🙂

Or, you can find other coaches on the internet if you think I won’t be able to help you become a better man and figure out why women like bad boys, so that you can change your life.

Point is, you’re living in the age of the internet. You have the knowledge of the whole world at your fingertips. SEEK HELP, and you will get it. There are many more people other than me who can help you – some better, some worse.

You can start learning all of this today so you’ll never have to ask why do girls like bad boys so much and don’t give YOU any attention. But only if you actually decide to start and take positive action to attain this coveted playboy lifestyle.

But let me reiterate the most important point here:

Some people will like you, others won’t!

This is a true fact of life. You can’t please everyone.

That girl MAY reject you, but she also may not. If she does, the experience will be invaluable because you’ll learn and will be able to improve your next approach.

If you learn, you’ll do better with another girl as a result of getting rejected by the first one. Learning from it and then using what you’ve learned to better yourself.

So the only way to stop being an emotional mute is to speak your mind to others. Try it for yourself, see how liberating it is and learn by doing. Another reason why women like bad boys so much is because they understand that not everyone’s going to like them. And they’re PERFECTLY FINE WITH IT.

You’ll quickly notice a change in your life, if you only dare to try. It takes a bit of courage to jump into that unknown world – but boy is it worth it!

You will be able to do stuff you previously couldn’t or didn’t DARE to.

You’ll notice that you didn’t suddenly burst into flames when you spoke your mind and stood up for yourself. That you’ll live and even thrive when you see that people don’t care when you said something “shocking.”

You may even find individuals who share your views on life and make some genuine friends as a result!

This all comes down to authenticity and being genuine with the people you meet.

For example, when I approach women, I go in, say “Hi!” – and improvise. I rely on my personality, my wit and my sense of humor.

I don’t think of stuff like “Oh what if I say this and she doesn’t like it?” SO FUCKING WHAT?

If she doesn’t like it, it means she just has different views than mine. I can then just say “Been fun chatting!” and move on to the NEXT girl. Until I find someone who does share those views.

There are BILLIONS of people on this planet – you don’t have to waste your time on those who don’t understand you, and cry about being rejected. Simply because you can move on to the next one. That’s the abundance mentality that most coaches talk about.

And by being unabashedly direct like that, I never have problems with eliciting strong emotional responses from women. 

You are living YOUR life, which you should live for yourself and NOT for other people!

That said, you have to develop your personality up to a point where you can actually RELY on it and on your sense of humor. That’s to become self-amusing when you talk to people, both guys, and girls. But that’s a whole another story for another time.

You can join my newsletter to learn more about self-amusement and why it’s critical in spiking attraction in girls and making them want you.

Here’s something to massively help you with good Bad Boy vibes on dates:

You need to learn this if you want to elicit STRONG EMOTIONAL RESPONSES from girls on dates. Playful Roleplaying is a technique I personally use on nearly EVERY SINGLE DATE that gets me laid like there’s no tomorrow:

Why Role-Playing on dates is Amazing!

Why do women like bad boys who ruffle their feathers and tease them? Because these men can pull this technique off naturally, without even thinking about it.

If you learn to do this technique and can consistently pull it off successfully. You’ll notice a ridiculous increase in your success rate on dates with women.

This technique is just one of my many trump cards. It takes the best parts from bad boys and incorporates that to make your dates incredibly fun and emotional for women.

Do yourself a huge favor and GET THIS HANDLED. Almost anyone can learn this, if they just get off their lazy ass and put some time and effort into it.

I have dozens of these techniques, most are in my book about getting laid.

Get This Guide 100% RISK FREE, to Skyrocket Your Success With Women Today!
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Final thoughts on why women are attracted to bad boys versus nice guys

I hope you now see that women love bad boys vs nice guys for a very good reason. Not because they’re bad people, but because they are authentic, genuine, don’t try to impress, have solid standards and boundaries. Among other things

If you want to learn more about what attractive character traits these rebels and baddies possess, I suggest you read what makes a man attractive to a womanIt’ll help you learn much more about how to have a bad boy attitude with women you meet so they’ll like you.

Finally, I’m not saying that you should abuse women or treat them like shit. I am merely informing what women respond to and why girls like bad boys and want to sleep with them!

In the end, for a stable and healthy relationship, all of this has to be combined with compassion, kindness, dependability, honesty, trustworthiness, vulnerability, authenticity and caring. As well as COMPATIBILITY.

So I hope I shone some much-needed light on the subject of women liking bad boys and wanting them in their lives.

If you have any thoughts on the subject, you’re more than welcome to share them down in the comment section below, where we can start a discussion.


P. S. – Too long; didn’t read?

TL;DR VERSION of why do women like bad boys if you just read the conclusion:

There’s a thing called masculinity and femininity. So if you don’t know what’s going on and constantly shout “Why girl like bad boy and not me!?” then make sure to read up on this.

Feminine women are massively drawn to masculine men. And masculine men display certain incredibly attractive character traits like confidence, DOMINANCE, indifference, directness and decisiveness, self-reliance, among many other things. And they generally don’t doubt themselves all that much.

This sparks massive attraction and incredibly addicting strong emotions in women who meet and get to experience such a guy.

To contrast this, “Nice guys” are boring, aim to please, and generally don’t display these attractive character traits. Because they are constantly trying to play it safe and are wracked with self-doubt as a result. Which is one of the most unattractive things you can display.

They don’t elicit strong emotional responses in girls and constantly keep asking in frustration why women don’t like them.

And because of that, the “jerks” and “assholes” get to have all the fun while the nice men go home and jerk off alone.

But don’t worry, there’s a very good and fast way to fix all of this.

Just go to Saulis Dating and read what it says there, in full. If you follow the process and do the exercises.

I will transform you into someone who incorporates the best traits of both bad boys and nice guys and help you remove the negative ones. Thus becoming a true man of value – a sexworthy man who women WANT to sleep with and start various relationships with. Because of how you make them feel!



saulisdating Written by:

Andrius Saulis has over 15 years of extensive hands-on experience and expertise in the field of Dating, Seduction, Relationships and Social Dynamics. He's helping men all around the world get rid of their insecurities, regain their high self-esteem and confidence, and become successful with women. He teaches men how to attract and seduce women not through manipulative tactics, but by being their genuine, authentic and charming selves, while exuding a flirty, confident and sexy vibe that women can't get enough of. Learn how to have a flawless first date with The Saulis Dating Guide to get as many serious or casual relationships as you want.


  1. xxx
    November 24, 2016

    An excellent reaⅾ. I’ll certainly be back.

  2. Macz
    December 26, 2016

    Yea it has been a really interesting read, i came here by a thread on reddit. I like how you put the effort into helping “good boys” like me to improve their love life.

  3. Tolly
    December 28, 2016

    This is a topic that is close to my heart… Many thanks!
    Exactly where are your contact details though?

  4. Amen
    October 22, 2017

    Well since most of the women today are very busy sleeping around with different men all the time which certainly explains that. And most women nowadays like to party and get wasted, so how would they be able to settle down with only one man anyway? Very impossible.

    • saulisdating
      October 22, 2017

      Well, you said it yourself: Most women – which means not ALL. So you can certainly find lots of women who are still looking for a stable and serious relationship. There are plenty of girls who want to settle down. It’s not impossible.

  5. Josh
    February 3, 2018

    Many of the descriptions you gave under the nice guy category do not qualify to meet a “nice guy” requirement. We should separate nice guys by heart from self proclaimed “nice guys” (who are actually just jerks inside) so as not to create confusion. There are also many “nice guys” who do not act like jerks and I am quite sure are many who do not lack confidence. However, I know there are many men that are genuine nice people by heart, but because of social stigma, or how they just are, they are seen as insecure losers (only because in modern society everyone demands that men be strong and confident, otherwise they should fuck off). I believe we should not humiliate these types of people just because of their nature and everyone should be given a chance. (Just think how many people like them might not ever find someone they love just because they lack self esteem and/or no one can appreciate them and/or help them).

  6. saulisdating
    February 4, 2018

    Hi, thanks for writing and pointing it out. I didn’t mean that genuinely nice people are jerks as well. But yeah I see why it may have sounded that way. I’ll edit the article to reflect this. Cheers.

  7. Satan
    March 27, 2018

    I think you are using the word ‘nice’ more often in its etymological sense (ignorant) than anything else. Women expect men to think exactly like them, which is of course illogical, men have a masculine mode of thought, and they are generally more honest(being men there is much less emphasis on their emotions(they are generally much less/nowhere near as emotional) which is why they don’t understand women, because natural players have a feminine brain), (so when it comes to women, regular guys just have no idea about what they like, or what manipulative little games they play) the way women communicate is very narcissistic(women are generally untrustworthy, they engage in powertalk to justify their emotions, and especially compared to the average man, since men are generally fairly honest).

  8. Wealthy
    May 25, 2018

    So who are you, a bad guy or a nice guy? Thanks for sharing this article. It is very helpful.

  9. raleigh
    June 24, 2018

    I believe something is wrong with the table above, some characteristics there should be for good boys and not for bad boys

    e.g like wth good boys know their life purpose better than bad boys haha

    and good boys are way more genuine and authentic like fuck

  10. Anonymous
    August 5, 2018

    Can I make a post on how to flirt with women

  11. Trisha
    September 21, 2018

    This misses on quite a few points, and does a lot of over-generalizing. I was attracted to “bad boys” in my late teens and early 20s, as did most of my friends. None of those relationships lasted, as the men were initially attractive, but lacked depth. Now most of my friends, as well as myself, have had far longer, healthier relationships with men who are truly nice, considerate and empathetic, but also have confidence and are secure with who they are and what they want. So I think the best relationships are with men who combine traits from both sides.

  12. Chris
    November 11, 2018

    I have a question for the author. I have been with my girlfriend for 4 years now, we moved in together 2 years ago(after I was “officially” divorced) and shortly thereafter she started loosing interest in me. We had very HOT HOT fiery passion before but now I can’t get the time of day out of her. I had entered the relationship as a very “nice” guy and that worked well for a while but she has made passing comments over the years about me being needy. I do not believe she is cheating on me, for 1) she’s always home or at work and 2) anywhere she goes otherwise I go with her and 3) it’s just not in her nature..I KNOW she loves deeply…but It seems like she wants a bit of bad boy but… and here’s my question: after 4 years how do I turn into a bad boy? How much bad boy?
    Anything you can tell me would be helpful,

  13. Anonymous
    January 21, 2019

    (I’m talking about serious relationships, and not flings.)

    I really don’t think there is such a thing as all this stuff. People date other people who are interested in similar things, or quite a like. Sure, you can be attracted to stereotypes like bad boys or nice guys, but in the end, most people settle down and get married to a person who respects them and is like them. Dating stereotypes is usually a phase in teenagehood. Also, that table isn’t exactly accurate. You make really over the top comparisons. Like “Bad boys are confident and fun and adventurous.” Bad boys and nice guys can both be all those things.

    My advice is to just continue being yourself and engaging in your interests. Go to events that are based around something you like and you might find somebody you love. I went to a writing convention and I met my girlfriend there. We’ve been dating for 7 years now. I’m no bad boy or nice guy, I’m just me. Maybe be a little more groomed if you look “creepy” or something.

    Just be confident and don’t care what people say about you and you’re good to go.

    • saulisdating
      January 24, 2019

      Hi, thanks for your comment.

      You’re right, in the end, people mostly look for settling with others who are compatible with them.

      That said, this article is simply about the initial attraction and on what qualities in men women respond to on a gut level. When men embody certain “bad boy” traits, they simply have a much easier time attractive women initially and starting relationships with them. Which then can lead to either a serious thing or complete disaster if they’re not compatible in the end.

  14. Jimmy Allen
    February 23, 2020

    Thanks for the info 🙂

  15. Sheri Ballard
    March 3, 2020

    Great website. Lots of helpful info here. I’m sending it to a few of my friends. thanks for your hard work!

  16. March 28, 2020

    Do you mind if I quote a few of your posts as long as I provide credit and sources back to your blog?
    My blog site is in the very same niche as yours
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    • saulisdating
      March 28, 2020

      Sure, go ahead.

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    May 4, 2020

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    March 5, 2021

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    August 27, 2021

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  21. Santopolo
    October 28, 2021

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  22. Dave Redmond
    November 8, 2021

    Fantastic article. Completely gets how this works. I have many of the “nice guy” traits described and I always get friendzoned and the girls I like always date bad boys for all the reasons said here. Can’t believe this isn’t common knowledge amongst everyone.

  23. Fanculo
    August 22, 2022

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  25. sterile
    September 22, 2022

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  26. impasse
    October 16, 2022

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  27. bar kosh
    April 15, 2023

    Great post. I’m facing a few of these issues as well..

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