How to Make Her Chase You – a Girl or Woman

If you want to learn how to make her chase you and want you sexually – whether it’s a girl you like or some woman you adore – I’ll tell you exactly how to do that.

But first, here’s the answer to the most important question: When do women start to chase you?

It’s easy – Women begin chasing you when they become emotionally invested in you and love spending time with you.

when women start chasing you
Photo by Pablo Heimplatz

So, if you want to have a lot of women chasing you, then you need to develop your personality and certain attractive character traits to the point where they love spending their time with you and your mere presence become intoxicating to them. That way, when you’re not around them, these women will always start to think about you and the great time that you’ve spent together – which will make them think and obsess about you further, and they’ll start to want to chase you even more!

However, that’s not an easy thing to achieve, especially for guys who are new at the whole seduction and attraction thing, and particularly for those who have a bad inner game.

Because let’s face it – women want a man who is secure in himself and has his shit together – someone who has strong boundaries, is emotionally stable, unperturbable, and confident in his abilities. So, if you’re a blubbering mess when you’re taking to women and if you can’t even strike up a conversation with a girl and hold your own while flirting, how are you ever going to get a girl to chase you?

And that is exactly why getting your inner game in order should be your absolute first priority when learning to become successful with women and getting her to chase you.

And if you’re struggling with getting dates altogether because you don’t really know how to approach women yet, then I highly suggest you try your hand at some online dating. Here are some of the best services I’ve found for that.

Now let’s move on!

Inner Game Part – The Main Things Which Make Girls Want to Chase You

  1. Emotional Investment
  2. Your Life and Your Personality
  3. The way you make women feel around you
  4. Lack of Desperation – Many Options – Abundance Mentality
  5. Leadership

These are the main things that will make her want to chase you forever. Obviously, there are a few other things which will make women want to chase you, but none as important and crucial as these five.

I’m not going to show you some “tricks” or “super secret techniques that make all women want you and chase you” – instead I’m going to delve deep into inner game. Because your Inner Game takes care of 90% of your problems with women, when you’ve got it down – and trumps any cheap tactics and techniques in the long-term.

If you want some actual things and “techniques” that you can use for women to want to start chasing you – it’s near the end of the article. However, I highly recommend reading the Inner Game part first, because without it, those techniques will most likely fail miserably and spectacularly.

So, in order to show you exactly how to make her chase you and show what girls and women of all different shapes, sizes, and ages really respond to from an inner gam perspective – I’ll tackle them all, one by one.

First – Emotional Investment

Emotional investment is key to getting women to chase you all the time.

When someone is emotionally invested in you, it means that you are constantly occupying their thoughts and emotions. It means that when you’re not around, they’re always thinking about you, and wondering whether you like them or not. Hence, a little ambiguity will always help with getting girls to chase you.

For example, if a girl knows that you’re head-over-heels in love with her, that you’d do anything for her, and that you’ll do anything to impress her – she will lose any and all interest in you because she’s already “won” you and knows that she can have you at any moment. As a result, there’s no more challenge in it for her and you will become uninteresting to her – which will instantly prevent her to want to chase you in the first place!


On the other hand, when YOU are emotionally invested in a girl – you start to do everything in your power to try to impress her. This never ends well because you start to become needy, desperate, weird, and emotional around her. And remember – women don’t respect guys who are too emotional about them because they want a guy who is UNPERTURBABLE! Women want an emotionally stable and secure guy, someone they can rely on – and not someone who’s wishy-washy.

how to make her chase you
Photo by Ayo Ogunseinde

So, you must emotionally DIVEST yourself from women, while simultaneously making sure that they emotionally INVEST in you!

How do you divest?

1 – Simply realize that you don’t need to emotionally invest in her in the first place.

We grow up with the mainstream media, with our parents, teachers, and everyone else telling us to “always be nice to women, always give them what they want, always make sure to bring her flowers, supplicate, and love her forever” – along with tons of other bullshit.

Society and your emotions may make you feel like you need to follow girls around, impress them all the time, wait for them, put up with their bullshit, buy them drinks, bring them flowers, drive them everywhere, etc…but you actually don’t.

So – from now on, do not do anything for women that they do not deserve! And, only do something for women if you think that they would do the same thing for you as well! For example, if you’re thinking of buying her a drink when you’re at the bar, ask yourself: “Would she buy me a drink in a similar situation?” If she wouldn’t – don’t.

If a girl asks you to drive her somewhere, ask yourself: “Would she drive me somewhere if I asked and needed a lift?” If she wouldn’t – don’t!

Learn to say “No” to women! Not in a mean-spirited asshole kind of way, but in a simple “I value my time and I only do good things to people who do good things for me”

Self-respect is a very important part of becoming successful with women and getting girls to chase you. When she sees that you respect yourself and value your time over hers – she will want to emotionally invest in you further, and this will make her chase you more!

2 – Always focus on your own fun first and foremost!

When you’re going out on the town to meet women, or when you’re on a date with a girl – you should ALWAYS focus on your fun first.

The simple fact is – this is YOUR life, and you are meeting this girl to see if she’d be a good addition to your life – not take it over!

Women are the dessert to a good life – not the main course. And that is exactly how women should feel when you are meeting them and talking to them.

In fact, women WANT TO BE DESSERT in an awesome man’s life. Consider this when learning how to make her chase you: If a beautiful woman comes into your life and realizes that she’s the best thing that you have going for you – she’ll quickly lose all attraction towards you and move on to better prospects. Women want to be a part of something special – they want to be a part of an awesome man’s life, and if they see that you’re incredibly needy, accommodating, supplicative, and desperate in your actions towards them – they’ll quickly realize that your life sucks and leave you.

But when I say that women want to be with a man who has an awesome life, I don’t mean that he has to be rich, handsome, super successful, etc. All he has to do is have his shit together, be emotionally stable, secure, fun, and interesting to hang around with, and have some hobbies he’s passionate about, as well as being able to make her feel various emotions and excitement with him from time to time. Most men can easily achieve this when they become mature.

So, if you want women to start to chase you – make sure that you always focus on your fun first and foremost. This will show her that you don’t have any ulterior motives, that you don’t give a rat’s ass about impressing her, and this will make her want to chase you even more because it will show her that you have options in your life and are not desperate to get her to sleep with you.

As an example, imagine if you paid your favorite celebrity a lot of money to come spend a weekend with them. And, when you arrive at their place and you ask them “So what are we gonna do?” – they reply with “Oh, I don’t know, I don’t have anything planned, what do YOU want to do?”. Wouldn’t you be PISSED? You’ve paid a lot of money because you wanted to become a part of THEIR awesome life – not make a plan of your own!

And that is exactly how girls feel when you don’t have a plan around them. When men don’t have a plan when they’re going on a date with a girl, it’s going to be a shitty date. Women want to join YOUR life – not lead you around in THEIRS. And that is exactly why you need to focus on your own fun first and foremost, and simply invite them into your life to share in the experience that is you.

You may think that focusing on yourself and you having fun is rude, selfish, and an asshole thing to do – but you’d be read wrong – because women are attracted to the ACT OF LEADING, and not necessarily the things you’re going to do together. I’ll explain this more below.

how to make a woman chase you
Photo by Matheus Ferrero

Second – Your Life and Your Personality

It’s all about having an awesome and interesting life that you like and enjoy. Girls start chasing you when they spend time with you and see that you’re a fun, interesting, exciting, or even chill dude who enjoys life, likes where he’s at, and has lots of various experiences to share.

You see, humans are wired to seek good feelings. And if you have a life that sucks – if you don’t enjoy your job, your hobbies, your friends, and everything else you have going on in your life – it will subconsciously show in everything that you do, and girls will see that your life sucks and that they’ll get no good feelings if they associate with you, which will never make them want to chase you or even spend time with you.

So, never forget your mission, never forget your goals, ambitions, and passions in life – and always try to improve yourself and the quality of your life. Little by little, bit by bit, you’ll achieve more and more, gain more experience, accumulate knowledge, wealth, power, friends, and everything else that makes life worth living – and women will see that you have an awesome life and they’ll want to chase you even more.

Third – The way you make women feel around you

This is the cornerstone of attraction and seduction. This is what makes women love and adore bad boys. Do you think bad boys have problems with women chasing them and wonder how to make a girl chase you?

If you can make a woman feel great around you and enjoy her time with you – she’ll become addicted to you like you’re her drug. Then, you bet your ass that she’ll want to chase you and pursue you until you sleep with her or even start a relationship.

It’s not about what you have, it’s not about what you own, and it’s definitely not about what you do – it’s all about how you can make women feel, because emotions are the key to true attraction, and are incredibly important in proper seduction. I won’t go over it in great detail this time because I’ve already done that in another in-depth article which you can find here: Why do women like bad boys and don’t respect nice guys?

If you want to understand how to make girls chase you then you need to read it and see why women massively respond to men who can evoke strong emotions in them!

Fourth – Lack of Desperation – Many Options – Abundance Mentality

I’ve already briefly mentioned it before, but having an abundance mentality is very important when you’re around women. If a woman thinks that you’d do absolutely anything for her in order to not lose her – she will never respect you. She’ll also never chase you because why would she start chasing someone who she thinks is a loser?

And make no mistake, if you’re desperate to get laid, sex-starved, and needy – she’ll definitely think that you’re a loser who has zero other options.

When there’s an abundance of women in your life, you automatically become someone who has high standards when it comes to women. When you meet a girl you like – you don’t instantly start jumping through hoops to do everything to please her. That’s because you don’t need this one girl because you know that there are plenty of others who would gladly have fun with you, and you won’t feel bad if you lose this particular one.

Would you then tolerate bad behavior from women? Would you listen to their boring conversations when you don’t like the topic? Would you care about when girls talk about nice shoes for an hour and not change the topic? Of course, you wouldn’t! If you’re someone who values your time and has many great things going on in your life, you won’t tolerate bullshit from women, and in fact from anyone else.


Women want a man that will help them grow and introduce them to a better life and a more interesting world than the one they currently inhabit.

They don’t want someone who always agrees with everything they say, who’s a total pushover who can’t say no and express his own opinion. Women want a man who is willing to walk away at any moment – not because he is some jerk or asshole – but because once a man shows that is he is NOT willing to walk away at any time; there is no challenge or growth in the experience.

However, the sad fact is that lots of men lead very uninteresting lives, so when a beautiful woman comes along, she more often than not instantly becomes the most interesting and important thing in those men’s lives because they’re so desperate and sex-starved that they wouldn’t care if she’s being mean, bitchy, uninteresting, boring, spoiled, malicious, etc.

Many men have no standards these days – and this makes them unattractive to women. And women will NEVER want to chase a man who has no standards, who is desperate, needy, and doesn’t have any options.

That is why if you want to make her chase you, you have to show that you’re willing to walk away and that you won’t tolerate any bad behavior or other bullshit!

This is easy to achieve when you actually have many girls in your life, but if you don’t have other girls, it’s not an easy thing to achieve, so you’d have to fake it till you make it and simply delude yourself a little bit. If you’ve never had abundance, imagine you are some popular celebrity who gets tons of girls easily, like Tiger Woods, or Brad Pitt, or Ryan Gosling, or whatever – and think about how he would feel and act in your situation. Would he be needy and desperate? Would he want to know how to make a woman chase you? Of course, he wouldn’t! So act like that until you achieve your abundance.

And, if you ever had abundance but now you don’t – then just put yourself back into that mental space and remember that girls easily sense when you’re desperate.

how to make a girl chase you
Photo by Danny Kekspro

Fifth – Leadership and Being Able to Lead

Being able to lead is very important when learning how to make a girl chase you. Leadership is a very attractive character trait that every person greatly respects and admires in other people.

It’s one of the most attractive character traits that you can embody – and the best part about it when it comes to attraction and seduction is – you don’t have to spend decades developing it.

Leading on a date or when you’re out meeting women in bars and clubs is very simple. It’s all about not asking questions like “What do you want to do?”, “What do you want to eat?”, “Where do you want to go?”, “What do you want to listen to?”, “What should we do?”, and so on and so forth, and just doing stuff that you want to do and taking her along for the ride.

Instead of asking all these questions when you’re with a girl, simply say stuff like “Let’s go eat at <whatever>”, “Let’s go do <whatever>”, etc. Instead of asking what music she’d like, put on the type of music YOU like.

Remember, women want to experience YOUR life, they don’t want to show you theirs until they like you. So, once again, focus on having fun yourself, and invite them to experience your life – and trust in yourself that what you’re doing is fun for you – and it will automatically become fun for her as well.

Leading is all about having a plan and simply sticking to it. If she doesn’t want to go along with your plan and doesn’t want to do something – she will tell you! If she’s not objecting, then it means that she’s perfectly fine with it – and you should continue doing whatever you were doing and, paradoxically, don’t even think about stuff like how to make her chase you and want you.

Just chill, relax, don’t become emotionally invested in her right off the bat, and do your thing while bringing her along for the journey.

Outer Game Part – Techniques That Will Make Her Want To Chase You

This part will be very short and sweet because I won’t have to go into any in-depth explanations and will just tell you what works.

Learn the word “NO”

This one’s pretty damn self-explanatory. If you show you’re not a doormat, women will want to spend more time with you. Show women that you will only be nice to them and do something good for them if they DESERVE your niceness and your time.

You wouldn’t say “Yes” to an unreasonable request from a random dude, would you? So why would you accept the same request from a hot girl? Have some damn standards, and learn how to say NO when someone asks you to do something you don’t want to do, whether they have a vagina or don’t – then many more women will want to chase you.

Women love a man with personal boundaries. They want to see if you have standards and aren’t a door mat, or if you’re someone who’d do ANYTHING to be with a hot girl.

Fun and Lighthearted Self-Deprecation

You know how most guys will try to impress really beautiful women with their job titles, connections, things they own, how much money they make, etc. They’re trying to impress, and that comes off as incredibly socially inept, which will never make her want to chase you.

And you, on the other hand, will never brag about yourself and may even nonchalantly say something to the tune of “Oh yeah I work at a popcorn stand”, with a hearty grin and a twinkle in your eye.

It’s as if you couldn’t even be BOTHERED with trying to impress her. That infers an inordinate amount of value right from the start because she’s used to guys going head over heels trying to prove how better they are than the next guy and why she must go with them instead, which displays very low self-esteem.

In fact, you can joke around about your profession, how much money you make, etc. all you want, and don’t take her seriously. I mostly don’t tell women what I do until after I sleep with them and instead make up ridiculous or gag jobs. If they pry and really get into it and ask me and persist too much, I use the magic words “Hey, I’ll tell you later when I trust you more”.

How’s that for creating an even stronger emotional roller-coaster for her? Now there’s intrigue, now there’s mystery, now there’s the fact that I don’t give a shit about pleasing her and qualifying myself, and so on and so forth. Those emotions will make her want to chase you more than anything in the world because most girls and women love a man who can keep them on their toes.

So, don’t be a try-hard. Most hot women expect you to try and impress them – and if you do the exact opposite in a fun and light-hearted way, it will work wonders. Just remember to calibrate and don’t overdo it.

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Let’s do …, but only if you…

This little magic formula is perfect for many occasions. It’s a bit manipulative and mostly to be used for very hot girls with huge egos. It’s great for when you’re about to pull the girl from the club to your home, or introduce her to your friends, or take her to the dancefloor, or move her to a new venue, etc, so that she’ll be much more likely to comply with you and want to chase you after.

You simply say something like “Hey, LET’S go dance, BUT ONLY IF YOU don’t embarrass me in front of everyone on the dancefloor.”

Or, “Hey, LET’S go meet my friends, I’ll introduce you, BUT ONLY IF YOU don’t creep them out.”

or even “Hey, LET’S go play ping-pong at my place, it’s a few minutes away, BUT ONLY IF YOU promise not to freak out my dog (promise to keep your hands to yourself, don’t steal any of my shit, etc)”

Essentially, it again has to do with those all-important personal boundaries, even if these boundaries are somewhat comedic and fake. It shows her that you are a cool guy of high value, that you already have abundance, and are not needy or desperate, and someone who she’d want to hang out with.

But what it also does, especially to hot women who are used to guys being needy and desperate near them, is show her that you’re someone who’s DIFFERENT – and it plucks at their ego in a massive but very effective way. And trust me, very beautiful women have MASSIVE egos because of their looks since they get validated from nearly every guy they meet in their day to day life. They’ll be thinking like “How DARE he give me this rule. I’m like the hottest girl here, he should be BEGGING me to come to his place, like most guys do. Why isn’t he doing that? Am I not cool enough for him? Am I not hot enough for him?” and then she starts rationalizing, eventually getting to the conclusion that going with you will be HER idea, because her thoughts will go to something like “I’m gonna go with him and SHOW HIM that I’m the best girl there is!”

And the rest is history.


Learning how to make women chase you is a very admirable goal – but don’t forget that there’s no simple “trick” or “super special technique” which will make her want you and crave you forever and ever. Ultimately, it’s all about developing yourself into an awesome, secure, self-confident, and emotionally stable man who does not easily get emotionally invested in women and instead causes them to become invested in him!

Making her chase you is all about mastering your inner game and then showing women that you are there for YOURSELF and that you are someone who they’d have a fun, interesting, or an exciting time together with.

If you want to learn how to become this type of man, and especially what to do on dates so that women end up having a wonderful time with you, connect with you, and want to sleep with you every single time, then I’ve got something special for you. It will solve your problems in dating, and show you exactly how to get her to chase you, and want to meet with you again and again because your presence becomes so intoxicating to her that she’ll crave you inside her.

Click Here To Find Out: The Saulis Dating Guide

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One Comment

  1. Gameke
    April 13, 2018

    I like Fun and Lighthearted Self-Deprecation. all outer and inner game are very good.

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