How to Ask a Girl to Fuck

It’s time you learn how to ask a woman to sleep with you successfully, provided she’s already attracted to you.

Because the truth is, asking women to sleep with you and getting a positive response isn’t that difficult. If you know how to do it right. It simply involves doing the right thing at the right time. And encouraging her to become more intimate with you.

That said, a lot of guys screw this crucial step up and end up with nothing. They either scare the girl off by being too pushy. Break the all-important sexual tension. Or say something really weird, crass or stupid. Which turns women off and makes them not want to have sex with you at all.

So make sure to read every word below. Because I’ll tell you exactly how to do it the right way, to maximize your chances of success.

You don’t want to miss any subtleties. Especially because I’m also going to reveal how to ask an older woman for sex, which requires a bit more tact. And to make things even better and more interesting, I’ll also mention how to ask a married woman to sleep with you. So you don’t get punched in the face or ruin a marriage.

How to Ask for Sex Without Asking

Before you make your move and ask the girl to sleep with you, several very important things have to happen first. Otherwise, your chances of success are VERY LOW!

  1. She has to be attracted to you.
  2. She has to be comfortable with you and your touch.
  3. You have to have an emotional connection. (unless she’s just looking for a hookup)
  4. There needs to be sexual tension between you. (Here’s an article on what sexual tension is.)

If even one of these crucial steps is missing, you’ll rarely get a positive response when you ask a woman to sleep with you. Especially if you do it very directly.

asking women to sleep with you successfully

That’s because women simply don’t want to sleep with men whom they aren’t attracted to and whom they don’t trust and aren’t comfortable with.

They also usually don’t want to have sex with guys who they have no emotional connection with. Unless they’re looking for a hookup.

This is especially true if there’s no sexual spark between the two of you. Which is also known as chemistry and sexual tension. This tension is really important to turn a woman on make her wet and encourage her to want to have sex with you.

And why would women in general want to have sex with you without any of these things?

Sleeping with someone is a VERY emotional experience for women. And you have to like and trust the person to do it.

So make sure you’ve already handled all these crucial steps above if you want to get a positive answer when you ask a woman for sex.

Oh, and make sure to read how to attract women in general if you’re struggling with that. Because it’ll really help you with your seduction skills when meeting a new potential lover and having a successful first date.

With that out of the way, let’s get to the nitty-gritty of how to actually ask women to sleep with you.

How To Ask a Girl to Have Sex

Now, provided she’s already attracted to you and there’s enough sexual tension in the air, here’s how I ask a woman to sleep with me and succeed virtually every time.

I don’t ask her anything! Instead, I encourage more intimacy and then invite her to have sex with me. By leading the interaction towards sex in a manly, firm, yet gentle way.

Sounds counter-intuitive, doesn’t it? Well, let me explain why you shouldn’t ask women to sleep with you directly if you want to succeed a lot.

Here's how to ask a girl to sleep with you so she says yes

Asking for sex from women directly is a turn-off

I mean, you can go and simply say something like “I like you and I think you’re beautiful – do you want to have sex with me?” And you’ll definitely get a “Yes…” if she REALLY likes you as well. But only some of the time.

But only some of the time is not good enough for me. I want to maximize my chances of success, when in a situation like that. I’m sure you do, too, right? So listen up!

Asking for sex directly doesn’t work very often. That’s because there are many, many things wrong with saying something like this in the form of a direct question. And it doesn’t matter how “beautifully” you word the question itself. The biggest problem with why you’ll often get a negative response is the fact itself that you’re actually ASKING her for sex.

This shifts the whole masculine-feminine dynamic and puts you at a MASSIVE disadvantage.

And suddenly, she has power over you. Instead of you both being equal in the equation, or you having more power.

Why? Because women want to be LEAD. They don’t want to lead, when it comes to intimacy and things like these. Since when it comes to intimacy, the majority of women like dominant men. 

Also, asking for sex, instead of leading women towards sex, dissipates sexual tension. 

In the exact instant women hear you asking for sex, they know they’ve won the mating dance. They now have you in the palm of their hand, and all power shifts to them. Because there’s zero ambiguity left, zero tension, zero anticipation.

But when you LEAD women towards sex without explicitly mentioning it, the sexual tension and anticipation persist until the very last moment. Until you start having sex! Which is a HUGE turn-on.

Why asking for sex won’t go well

The mere fact you ask a woman for sex in the form of a question is pretty bad. Because it overtly shows insecurity and neediness.

I mean, if you were so sure of yourself, why even ask her?

The question of consent comes up, of course. But contrary to popular belief, if you know how to read social cues, body language and facial expressions. Then you will KNOW that she consents to sex implicitly from her behavior and actions. You don’t have to hear it from her explicitly.

Unless you’re a dense fool who doesn’t understand negative body language and her saying “No.”

So once you ask her for sex, you’re giving up the leading to her. You’re FORCING her to lead the interaction. And now it’s up to her to move things forward. Which often won’t end in your favor.

Once again, this is because women want men to lead.

The vast majority of women want men who are dominant, assertive, decisive, etc. Men who know what they want and go for it. Men can lead the interaction where it needs to go so women can get lost in the moment and the experience.

Lead and don't just ask a girl to sleep with you

Intimacy and sex should happen naturally

Basically, sex should be a natural progression of your interaction with women. They should be able to later say “Oh, it just kind of happened!” when they later think about how things went. Instead of “Oh he asked me to have sex with him and I said yes,” which can easily look like they’re being slutty.

By naturally, I mean that you should meet up for a date and have fun. On that date, you should learn about each other and connect on a deeper level. Revel in each other’s personalities, and share your likes, dislikes, wants, needs and desires. Then flirt, tease and touch each other a lot, so you get comfortable with one another. And finally, when you’ve enjoyed each other’s company and come to the conclusion that you like each other… It should only be natural that you’ll both want to enjoy each other’s bodies as well. Wouldn’t it? 

If you want to learn how to have such a great date pretty much EVERY SINGLE TIME. Then click the image below:

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Anyway, it’s all part of the masculinity and femininity dynamic. Feminine women respond powerfully to masculine men. And the ability to lead and move things forward is a hugely masculine trait. (I’ll be writing a full article about femininity and masculinity soon)

So don’t be surprised when you get a negative response when you ask a woman to sleep with you by presenting a question to her.

However, don’t get me wrong! This isn’t about forcing women to have sex with you because NO means NO! Instead, this is about not giving your power away and being the manly man women love. Basically, building sexual tension and then capitalizing on it.

How to Sleep With a Women

Now, instead of learning how to ask a woman to sleep with you with a question. It’s better to learn how to do it in an infinitely better way.

By leading your interaction towards sex, both physically and verbally, without asking any questions.

So how do you do this, exactly?

Well, there are many different ways to make your move and initiate sex without having to actually ask for it.

The ask itself is always implied by your actions and tonality and is non-verbal. So there’s always a chance for her to decline, in which case you must back off. Because it’ll obviously mean she’s not attracted enough to you to want to sleep with you yet.

But that doesn’t mean she won’t warm up to you with time. For you to only try and encourage sex again later. 

Some examples of leading a woman to bed to have sex

Let’s say you’re both at your place or hers. What now?

Encourage women to sleep with you without asking

Well, one option would be to escalate aggressively and directly. By getting close to her and pulling her in for a makeout session. And then, while you’re in the middle of passionate French-kissing, simply lifting her up and physically taking her to bed.

Another option would be to pin her against something and prevent her movement. Like against the wall, or couch, or whatever. Or you can simply lift her up and have her wrap her legs around you and hold her. While passionately making out with her. Some women will find these things immensely arousing.

This approach often works well because of the display of dominance. Since the girl will be REALLY turned on and aroused if she’s lost in the moment of a huge makeout. So the next natural step is to take each other’s clothes off and have sex.

Slow and steady can also win the race

Another approach would be to take things slow and steady. By ramping up the sexual tension so she becomes aroused and wants you badly herself.

You could both get comfortable together on a couch, turn on some sweet tunes to enhance the atmosphere. Then sensually talk to her, touch her intimately, gaze into her eyes with strong yet sexual eye contact, all to get her in the mood.

Then tease her with kisses and pulling away. Tease her with light brushes against her thigh with your hand. With your lips on her neck, behind her ear, etc. Get closer to her so your faces are right next to each other, put your arm around her, whisper something sexy into her ear, etc. Initiating massages and caresses is great too.

This drives women WILD when done right.

At this point, you can either just go for it by initiating a makeout. Or try saying some naughty things to get her to think about sex. If you think she’d enjoy the latter, then you can get increasingly naughty with what you’re saying. As long as it turns her on and increases her arousal.

Otherwise, what I do is say “Come, sit here…” and guide her physically so she sits on top of me. Then I put my arms around her and kiss her. While kissing her, I start taking off her clothes little by little. If she likes you enough, sex will follow.

With enough sexual tension, she’ll sleep with you without asking.

You see, the whole thing of how to ask a woman for sex without actually asking her for it is to ramp up the sexual tension as much as possible.

Then no matter what, she’ll want to sleep with you herself. Because she’ll be really aroused and horny.

This involves lots of powerful eye contact, intimate touching and talking about sexual topics. It does NOT involve you asking for sex directly because it breaks the whole mood.

Also, it doesn’t even matter where you are. If there’s enough sexual tension, she’ll be ready to jump on you and hook up with you even if you’re at a bar, club, restaurant, park, beach, wherever.

I’ve had so many dates where the sexual tension was so palpable that we ended up hooking up in the bathroom of the venue. Just because she got so horny she was down for anything, without me even asking to sleep with her at all.

I just notice she’s down for it in the way she’s looking at me and how she’s touching me. She has those “puppy dog” eyes, which pretty much say “Take me and fuck me now!” And I take her by the hand and lead her to the bathroom. That’s it.

How to ask a woman to have sex with you correctly

So, if you want to get laid a lot and sleep with women without even asking them for sex. Make sure you have a great time with them so they like you. And then RAMP UP THE SEXUAL TENSION LIKE CRAZY!

And then lead, lead and lead! Don’t wait for HER to do everything for you. Lead her to your place, lead her to kiss you by pulling her in, lead her to your bed to have sex. It’s YOUR responsibility to get what you want as a man.

Here’s how to build sexual tension to sleep with women

As I said before, eye contact, physicality and talking about sexual and spicy topics is the keys how to ask a woman to have sex with you without actually asking.

If you want an in-depth explanation of how all this works, then read my article on how to create and maintain sexual tension.

In short, when you’re already into each other, gaze longingly into her eyes. Look at her lips, lick yours as if you really want to kiss her, and smile knowingly. She’ll usually smile herself.

Intense eye contact is a very powerful thing and it’s proven to increase sexual desire with other people who you’re already interested in. So don’t make the huge mistake of underestimating its use when you’re with a woman you like and want to have sex with.

When it comes to physicality, it’s massively important to make women comfortable with you, to build attraction and eventually have sex.

So when you’re learning how to ask a woman to sleep with you without actually asking, make sure to be physical with her right from the start of your interaction.

That’s because if you refrain from touching her the whole time you’re with her. And then suddenly make your move and try to kiss her and initiate sex, she’ll often freak out. Because it’ll seem completely random and out of the blue. Very incongruent with how you’ve been acting up until that point.

For her not to freak out with your suddenly touching her and initiating sex. You need to make sure to establish you’re a physical guy early on. By being physical and touching her throughout your meeting right from the start, little by little

Here’s how to be physical right from the start

Hug her or shake her hand warmly when you greet her. Touch her on the shoulder or her arm when you’re making important points. High-five her when she says something cool or funny. Put your hand on her lower back when you’re entering the venue, and so on and so forth.

While you’re teasing her, flirting with her and joking around, nudge her, put your arms around her and shake her a bit. Just like you’d do with your buddy or little sister.

make sure you're physical with women always

When you’re leaving the venue, take her by the hand. When you’re crossing the street, extend your hand and hold her so she feels safe.

If you’re meeting in a bar or club, dancing is one of the best ways to get physically comfortable with one another.

Doing some fun and physical activity while on your date, like playing pool is also perfect. Because you can touch her throughout the whole thing when you’re engaging in banter, joking around and maybe even teaching her some moves.

Doing all this is hugely important because she’ll gradually become comfortable with you. And your eventual intimate touching will just seem like a natural progression of your interaction.

Oh, and this works particularly well on women who’ve lived a long life already. Which is why physicality is one of the most important things if you want to learn how to ask an older woman to sleep with you and have her agree.

Sexual talk and naughty topics

Finally, another way to increase sexual tension right before you ask her to sleep with you is by talking about sex.

Just don’t make it super obvious that you’re doing this because your goal is to make her horny or something. Because it’ll seem disingenuous and like you have an ulterior motive.

Instead, talk about sex and various sexual things like it’s no big deal at all. You have to establish you’re a non-judgmental guy when it comes to sex. Like it’s the most normal, natural and pleasant thing in the world.

So don’t be afraid to talk about sex and various naughty things with women. To show you’re not ashamed or anxious about your sexuality. And that you won’t judge women who have a “dirty mind.”

Ask them various things like where was the craziest place they had sex. Tell them various stories from your or your friend’s life which involve some sexy things. Or even interesting stories from the world which involve something sexual. Like the famous story of a male hamster who got into the female enclosure and impregnated all 100 of them.

how to ask a girl to have sex with you right now

The point is to encourage women around you to start thinking about sex. And since you’ll be the only guy around, they’ll eventually start associating those thoughts with you.

They’ll get aroused and maybe horny, which will increase sexual tension and will make them want to sleep with you. And that’s exactly how you ask a woman to sleep with you without even asking her but instead ENCOURAGING her to do so with your actions and words.

How To Ask An Older Woman To Sleep With You

Well, to tell you the truth, if you want to ask an older woman to sleep with you, it’ll work pretty much the exact same way. Except for a few minor differences.

The main difference is that it’ll actually be MUCH EASIER to ask an older woman to have sex with you and succeed. If you’re being masculine and showing you’re a manly man.

That’s because older women tend to have significantly more life experience and usually know what they want. Older women appreciate men who are direct, who also go for what they want and who don’t play all that many games. These are just some of the main reasons why younger men prefer dating older women.

That said, when you’re going after an older gal, specifically if you’re younger than her, you should make her feel sexy and appreciated.

An older lady is fully aware of the fact she’s no longer in her prime. And that there are plenty of younger, more attractive and desirable women running around. So you should mention she’s still got it. But also make sure to let her know that you put more importance on a person’s experience, personality and worldview, instead of just plain old looks.

This is one of the secrets of how to ask an older woman to sleep with you. Because it makes her see that you appreciate the finer things in life. And aren’t just going after something superficial because you have a fetish for older women.

Older women who you want to hook up with will often accept to have sex with you if you simply make the above known and then ask them directly. Because they don’t want to play games anymore and can appreciate and take a good opportunity when they see one.

how to ask an older or married woman to sleep with you the best way

How to ask a married woman to sleep with you

Now we’re delving a little bit into pretty dangerous territory. Because asking married women to sleep with you can end in complete disaster. If you do it at a bad time and if their significant others find out.

You don’t want to be a homewrecker or cause really big and serious problems for married women. By being too careless with asking them to have sex with you.

That’s why, to understand how to ask a married woman to sleep with you without causing complete chaos for her marriage. You should go read how to attract a married woman the right way. There, you’ll get a lot of really good information on how to go about seducing married women and then hooking up with them. In a way that won’t spell catastrophe.

But once you know how to be tactful and discrete when you’re hanging out with married women. You’ll be able to ask them to sleep with you in pretty much the same way this whole article shows.

This is because to be completely honest, it doesn’t matter if the woman is married, young, old, single, or even your boss. Because I’ve shown you the FUNDAMENTALS THAT WORK ON ANY WOMAN ALIVE. So if you do the fundamentals correctly, you’ll be able to sleep with married women as well as single ones.

I only ask you to be ethical about this. Because wrecking marriages just to have sex with someone is plain evil.

Final thoughts on asking a girl to sleep with you

I’m serious about this. If you focus on learning how to ask a girl to sleep with you, you’ll often fail. Because you’re going to be looking at the whole thing from the wrong angle.

Sure, like I said before, you’ll sometimes get a yes. But why would you want to risk it and often get a no as well?

Instead, focus on having fun with women, on getting to know them, flirting to build attraction and then RAMPING UP THE SEXUAL TENSION. Then women will want to sleep with you themselves without you having to ask for sex at all.

Although, to be fair, figuring out how to ask a married woman to sleep with you is a bit more difficult. Since you’ll often have to navigate very sensitive situations. Which is why I rarely recommend it. Unless you know you’d be saving her from a truly terrible marriage.

Don’t do what most unsuccessful guys do. And listen to what the most successful seducers in the world do to sleep with a lot of women. Guys who are successful don’t focus on silly things like how to ask a girl to have sex with them. They know what works and lead women to hook up with them.

If you have any further questions, then you’re always welcome to ask. Because I’m just scratching the surface here.

Seduction may seem very counterintuitive if you’re new at this. But that’s because it’s not logical and mostly emotion-based. Which is why it’s important to know what turns a woman on sexually and then do that instead.

Finally, if you want to learn the ultimate new way of how to get laid on your first date virtually every time, then CLICK THE IMAGE BELOW.

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saulisdating Written by:

Andrius Saulis has over 15 years of extensive hands-on experience and expertise in the field of Dating, Seduction, Relationships and Social Dynamics. He's helping men all around the world get rid of their insecurities, regain their high self-esteem and confidence, and become successful with women. He teaches men how to attract and seduce women not through manipulative tactics, but by being their genuine, authentic and charming selves, while exuding a flirty, confident and sexy vibe that women can't get enough of. Learn how to have a flawless first date with The Saulis Dating Guide to get as many serious or casual relationships as you want.


  1. Dante
    June 19, 2021

    I feel so nervous to talk sexual things with a girl I like and too I’m sure I have a low self esteem, please help on these 🙏🙏

    • January 29, 2024

      You get less and less nervous with more practice. Other than that, sign up for my newsletter to get a course on how to improve your self-esteem.

  2. Abel
    October 30, 2021

    It’s a great article. Please how do I sign for the free course?

    • January 29, 2024

      Sign up for the newsletter to get the free course. But it won’t be free very soon 🙂

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